


Issues

by catrasadoras



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, F/F, Fluff, Friends to Enemies to Lovers, Friends to Lovers, HSAU, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, catradora, eventually, just talk!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-10
Updated: 2019-09-22
Packaged: 2020-08-14 17:36:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 27,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20196094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catrasadoras/pseuds/catrasadoras
Summary: "Hold up, you and Adora weren't dating?""What?" Catra asks and she turns her back on Lonnie to hyper focus on the spaghetti and if her cheeks were red well that was due to the steam obviously. "No. We were friends.""Just friends?" Lonnie asks and Catra can hear the doubt in her tone.Or, the Catradora High School AU no one asked for but I'm writing anyway.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I just couldn't resist. No idea how long this will be to be honest but I'm going for slow burn but honestly? I might get frustrated and tell them to kiss already who knows? This chapter and probably the next is more world building/character building for this world that Catra and Adora are in but I had fun with it so please leave feedback and let me know what y'all think! Anyway, enjoy!

Catra was sitting on the bleachers, her legs stretched out up on the seat below her and her arms holding her up. She was enjoying the brisk autumn air and the soft wind that blew over her every now and again. She was examining the football field below where the big idiot jocks were practicing their plays. Catra scoffs, god she hated sports, she never understood what everyone's obsession was over them, why was someone so cool just because they could throw and catch a ball and why, oh why, did so many people come to these stupid football games to watch a bunch of teenagers toss a ball back and forth? The only reason Catra had ever gone was because...  _ ugh _ ! The memory hits her uncomfortably. A certain blonde jock, her best friend, appears in her vision, if Catra squints hard enough she can see the blonde down there with all the other players, running drills, being the best player on the field by a mile. 

She used to come here and sketch, she has one of her sketch books full of Adora in her stupid football gear which she’d idly drawn while waiting for Adora to finish so they could go grab something to eat already. The team was still pretty solid but none of them were Adora. A sour taste settles in Catra's mouth and she sits up, dropping her feet to the ground with a thud, she grips the base of the seat she was sitting on, feeling anger run through her veins. 

Adora wasn’t her best friend any more. She left. She’s not here. 

" _ Catra _ !" Catra jumps at the sudden booming voice, like fully jumps, her ass leaves the seat for a good few seconds. She turns to see who was calling her. "Catra!" She repeats again, taking the steps two at a time. Catra rolls her eyes, going back to her lounging position she had been in before. "Hey! Whoa, that is a  _ lot  _ of stairs!" Scorpia says laughing but also sounding a little breathless. She's wearing her jersey, since Scorpia was also one of those big dumb jocks but also a huge softie, like, the softest personality Catra has ever seen, just unbridled positivity and optimism, it was horrible. "I saw you skipped English," Scorpia says and Catra raises a brow in silent lieu of saying _ ‘So?’ _ . "I made notes for you!" She yells and shoves a book into Catra's hand. Truthfully, Catra didn’t need the notes but, well, at least  _ someone  _ noticed when she wasn’t there she supposed. 

"Thanks." Catra says, though she’s sure it doesn’t sound like she actually is. She shoves the book into her bag and stands, pulling the thing over her shoulder. 

"Wait up Kitty-Cat!" Scorpia calls, rushing after her, and Catra barely restrains herself from rolling her eyes at the nickname. Scorpia had so many for her, honestly, how does someone make so many nicknames for one single person? "Are you going to be home tonight?" Scorpia asks, fiddling with her fingers. Catra looks over her shoulder briefly before continuing on in her pace. 

"Duh," Catra says when they reach the bottom of the bleachers. Catra stops abruptly causing the white haired woman to crash into her back. "curfew and all that." Catra says with a shrug, turning to Scorpia who had just regained her balance again. 

"Right!" She exclaims, her eyes wide and bright and honestly Catra doesn’t understand how one person can be so fucking happy? Surely that's not possible? "But, uh, no offence Wildcat but, that’s never stopped you before." She did have a point. Catra rarely obeyed the curfew law that Weaver had laid down the evil witch. 8 o'clock? What were they? Nuns? 

"Yeah, well, I'm on cooking duty tonight," Catra responds. "can’t leave you guys high and dry." Not that she hasn’t before mind you. Well, she never had when Adora had been around, because Adora took that shit so seriously, but after Catra had kind of gone into a downward spiral if she was honest which probably wasn’t fair to her housemates. Scorpia lays her hands on Catra's shoulders and crouches down so she’s right up close to Catra's face. 

"That's so great to hear Wildcat, oh man, we were all so worried about you, well, not all of us, I'm pretty sure Lonnie was at least somewhat concerned, even though she won’t admit it, but I was very deeply concerned but, hey, if you ever need to talk I'm right here-" 

"Scorpia," Catra says, interrupting the woman's ramblings, her head was spinning at how fast those words came out of her mouth."personal space." Catra reminds her. It takes Scorpia a moment but a soft ‘oh’ leaves her mouth and a nervous chuckle as she moves back and Catra can breathe her own air again. "I'll see you tonight." Catra says walking away. This time, Scorpia doesn’t follow her and Catra is truly thankful for that small mercy. 

Despite what she just told Scorpia, she doesn’t feel like going back to that house yet, the memories of Adora are just as strong there, they're even more painful if she’s honest with herself because they'd shared a room, shared a bed, she was living in the worst place ever because all it did was remind her of how Adora had broken her heart. The reasonable side of Catra told her that she wasn’t truly upset with Adora, after all, did she really have a choice? But her stubbornness and bitterness beat that thought out of her every damn time because why did Adora get to be happy without her when Catra is so goddamn miserable? Things hadn’t been perfect, she knows that, but Adora had been her single bright spot, the thing that made the horrors of living in that God forsaken house bearable, and, in a way, Adora had been her shield. 

Weaver had a soft spot for Adora, though how that witch had any sort of soft spot for anything is completely beyond Catra, she really doesn’t know why she had one for Adora but she did, she always said Adora was going places while the rest of her wards were just bitter disappointments, things she had to tolerate living with her, that had no futures, or anything worth a damn to her, just Adora,  _ only  _ Adora. Catra had always been rebellious but Adora had brokered peace, she’d kept Catra out of trouble as best she could but now Weaver punished her without holding back, because she didn’t have the consequence of alienating herself from Adora anymore, and Catra couldn't resist because she had nowhere else to go, no one else to stand up for her, or, at least, keep things from being totally shit. 

She sighs, bashing shoulders with someone who yells at her in annoyance, she just flips them off over her shoulder. Everything was Adora's fault. 

_ But what… what if it's not?  _

" _ Ugh _ !" She yells, frustrated with herself, it gains her some looks from people but she doesn’t care. She doesn’t care about anything anymore. Caring only hurts her in the end. Fuck that. Why should she give a damn about anything? If Weaver was to be believed, she’d be some washed up failure after high school ended, which really wasn't that far away, she was going nowhere, so why should she forgive Adora? Why should she do anything? She pushes that thought away and something soft, that sounds suspiciously like a voice that belongs to a certain blonde with blue eyes, whispers that she is worth a damn but it's getting harder for Catra to listen every day she's apart from her.

** _//_ **

"Catra's cooking? I'm shocked." Catra rolls her eyes. 

"Shut up Lonnie." Catra retorts, she was currently standing by the stove which had a pot of spaghetti boiling along with sauce and mince, it was about the only dish she knew how to cook if she was honest but, hey, it's better than burnt frozen pizza - which she had made for them several times over, it was definitely not anyone's favourite. 

"In fact, I'm shocked you're even home." Lonnie decides to ignore Catra's instructions to shut up which is highly annoying if Catra does say so herself. "I thought you'd be moping about losing your girlfriend still." Catra balks at that and storms forward intimidatingly into Lonnie's space, pushing her and raising her fist threatenly. 

"She wasn’t my  _ girlfriend _ !" Catra growls and, wow, why did she have to say  _ that _ ? Lonnie's smirk is decidedly the worst thing Catra has ever seen that day - and she saw Kyle working out when she came home. "I mean, I don’t mope!" 

"Easy there Kitty-Cat," Catra hates it when Lonnie uses Scorpia's nicknames, she can tolerate Scorpia, at least she never says it in a mocking way, but not Lonnie. "besides, you're the epitome of broody gay." Lonnie says, shoving her back. Catra grumbles. This was how her and Lonnie worked, they grated on each others nerves, jabbed at one another with insults, but deep (deep) down, they did sort of care about one another. It's hard to grow up with one another and not care. 

"Hold up, you and Adora weren't dating?" 

"What?" Catra asks and she turns her back on Lonnie to hyper focus on the spaghetti and if her cheeks were red well that was due to the steam obviously. "No. We were friends." 

"Just friends?" Lonnie asks and Catra can hear the doubt in her tone. 

"No, not,  _ just friends _ , best friends but not... not like  _ that _ ." Catra answers. 

" _ Hmm _ ." Lonnie sounded unconvinced and Catra felt unconvinced too. Truthfully, she had felt something... something  _ more  _ for Adora, she had never acted on it, never said anything, because it was weird, crushing on your best friend is weird, Catra was certain it was just her being a hormonal teenager, things like that just happened, they went away, except it never went away and Catra realised that maybe she’d felt that way about Adora for a while, maybe since she had met her when she was just some scared kid, but now she’s here, 18 years old and still fucking obsessed with Adora. Despite all that, they never had been anything more than friends. 

_ Had they?  _

"Wait," Catra turns on them, Scorpia, Lonnie and Entrapta who were all sitting at the island - she was certain Rogelio and Kyle were also listening in on them from the living room. "did anyone else think we were together?" They all exchange glances and raise their hands, Scorpia had the gall to look guilty as she did it, and Catra couldn't believe this - even Kyle and Rogelio had their hands up. 

"Why do you look so surprised?" Entrapta asks. "The two of you displayed intimacy commonly used by those in relationships." 

"That's not... shut up!" Catra scowls, crossing her arms over her chest, her cheeks felt hot again.  _ Intimacy? What the hell does that even mean? _

"Yeah, didn’t you two share a bed?" Lonnie asks and Catra feels like she might just pass out truly. Entrapta nods and then pulls out a notepad from god knows where. 

"Yes, other intimate actions I observed were hand holding, kissing of cheeks, playfully wrestling, teasing, flirting-" 

" _ Flirting _ ?!" Catra explodes. "No, you know what, you were observing us? That's so weird Entrapta!" 

"Not as weird as the fact that you and Adora weren't dating." Lonnie pipes back up. 

"This discussion is over." Catra deadpans her most serious of looks on her face. Entrapta puts her notebook away hesitantly, Lonnie rolls her eyes and Scropia just smiles but Catra's sure this conversation is over. How ridiculous of them. To think her and Adora had been together? They were insane? Weren't they? Shit,  _ were  _ they?! 

Who cares? None of that matters now anyway. Adora left, she’s not coming back, whatever they were or weren't doesn’t matter. Catra can hear the group return back to chatting amongst themselves, leaving Catra alone which she was thankful for. She pulls her phone from her pocket and opens the text chain she’d left unread for the last few months since Adora had left. Adora had sent her multiple messages over the months asking Catra to reply, begging even, Catra had left every single one on read. She was an asshole like that. Adora had given up on her after months of bugging her. Part of Catra was bitter about that but she couldn't exactly blame Adora for not texting someone who clearly had no intention of responding. 

Catra reads the last message over and over again, her frown growing deeper with every re-read, 'I never wanted to leave you Catra'. How dare she end it on that message? Catra had half the mind to text her back now out of pure spite but she couldn't. She sighs, shoving her phone back into her pocket and she rubs her face in frustration. She couldn't think about this anymore, she has to cook food, eat it and avoid doing homework all the while being on edge for when Weaver comes home, all things that kept her incredibly busy. 

** _//_ **

After food was eaten, Scorpia and Entrapta were on cleaning dishes duty since Catra had made the damn food. Catra was chilling on the couch, her feet up on the coffee table, she had a controller in her hand and was playing video games absentmindedly but even with her half hearted investment she could run circles around these jokes. Catra had changed too, gone was her classic leather jacket and skinny black jeans with holes in them, now she was in sweats and a hoodie, her red bandana that tamed her curly hair was gone and now it was in all its untamed glory, her bangs landed on her face a little, she remembers Adora telling her how pretty she looked without the bandana and how much Catra had blushed at the compliment. 

The sound of the front door banging shut caused everyone sitting in the living room to startle, well, everyone excluding Catra. She rolls her eyes, already picturing Weaver's disapproving scowl at teenagers having fun because god forbid they play video games. Kyle yelps and jumps to his feet, scrambling around the place before grabbing a book and sitting down next Rogelio, Lonnie goes to the kitchen to help out Scorpia and Entrapata and Rogelio pretends to be doing homework. Catra doesn’t move. She carries on playing video games because she’s past caring what that old witch thinks. 

" _ Catra _ !" Kyle flinches in his seat and Catra feels her pulse quicken despite her attitude. Kyle and Rogelio jump up, leaving quickly, but they spare Catra sympathetic glances. Catra's forced to look at Weaver when the woman blocks her view of the TV. 

"Shadow Weaver, I didn’t hear you come in." Catra drawls in a bored tone. She knows that Weaver hates Catra calling her that but it's the only edge Catra has over her - that and her blatant disrespect. 

"Stand up,  _ now _ ," She demands and Catra obeys though she does it reluctantly. "I heard a very interesting story today from Octavia,"  _ Of fucking course. Why wouldn't Octavia tattle on her?  _ "you skipped English class." 

"English is boring." Catra shrugs half heartedly. Weaver begins laughing but it's not the kind of laugh you want to hear, it's completely humourless and it never fails to send a shiver down Catra's spine. Weaver grabs her chin a little too harshly if you ask Catra and tsks at her. "You really are a lazy worthless creature," Weaver spits, she let's go of Catra's chin and she gulps. She’s used to this treatment, she is, but still, every damn time it hurts. "you need discipline, your lack of respect cannot go unpunished." 

"I-" Catra blinks rapidly, she will  _ not  _ cry, but the burning of her eyes is really putting her to the test. "Why should I go to class? You said it yourself, I'm not going anywhere. Why should I even bother?" That, apparently, was the wrong thing to say. It's like darkness seeps into Weaver's eyes, everything feels suddenly suffocating and dark and Catra feels like she’s a little kid again, this is why she’s called Shadow Weaver. 

" _ Lazy, worthless, pathetic, _ " She spits and one after another is like a slap to Catra. "you will attend every class on your schedule is that understood? I will not have you making me look just as incompetent as you. To teach you the respect I'm looking for you will clean the bathrooms every day for a month-" 

"A month?!" Catra says in disbelief. 

"You can start now." Weaver demands pointing her hand. Catra wavers, she definitely had more fight in her left but she couldn't bring herself to do it, it was a losing battle, so she hangs her head and heads to the kitchen to retrieve cleaning supplies. Everyone gives her sympathetic looks, Scorpia looks near to tears, but they say nothing and Catra just collects her supplies and heads for the first bathroom. 

She slams the door shut and kicks it a few times for good measure before she slides down the door. The thing was, Catra was good at school, she may average C's but it’s out of pure spite, she’s incredibly stubborn like that, Shadow Weaver likes to complain about how useless Catra is, how much better Adora had been, how she expected Catra to get A's, that out of pure spite she made herself give the wrong answers on tests to make her average worse. She could ace her classes with ease, the only class she was getting an A in - because she actually genuinely enjoyed it - was Art. She hates that she even feels she has to do that but doing well in school, Catra feels like that would be giving Shadow Weaver what she wants and she never wants to do that, even if she self sabotages herself because of it. She groans, feeling the burning tears fall on her cheeks hot and wet. For the first time in months, Catra feels like she actually wants Adora here to comfort her, to defend her against Weaver, but all she’s got is a cold bathroom floor and the smell of bleach. This might be her all time low.

** _//_ **

Catra trudges up the stairs to reach her room, she passes Lonnie who goes to say something but Catra gives her a look. “Save it.” Catra says, opening the door to her room. She slams the door again, it was kind of her thing, how else do you rebel? Her room was empty as it had been for the past few months. Her bed was pushed against the furthest wall and Adora’s bed was near the door, that bed had gone unused because they’d shared Catra’s. Once Shadow Weaver had caught them and scolded them deeply for it, saying it was inappropriate, they had been kids, there was nothing inappropriate about it, but the habit carried on into the teen years, into years where they really shouldn’t have still been doing that kind of stuff, in the years where they were kind of too big to fit in the single bed together but they didn’t care, and Catra had become dependent on it, she still kind of was, even with Adora having been absent for months now Catra slept terribly without her presence. 

The night that Adora had left Catra had lashed out, she’d ripped photos of them, hit Adora’s bed several times with the baseball bat Adora had left behind and any items Adora hadn’t been able to pack Catra had thrown out her window. She settles on her bed, cross legged, and runs her fingers over her drawing of them. She’d done it when they had been about seven, crude sketches of their faces she’s scratched into the wall with a math compass, she’d scratched Adora’s face out in her rage but now she felt herself deeply regretting that decision. The room felt cold and dark without Adora, most things felt that way now. Catra didn’t like to think Adora was the only reason she was happy, it was a lot of pressure for one person to bear, but, well, she kind of was. Without her, things had been… well, awful really. 

Catra gives in, she pulls out her phone and like some stalker searches for Adora on Facebook, she was still friends with her, which, really, Catra should have blocked her or something but she never really used the thing. Catra scrolls through her timeline, her heart hammering in her chest, she sees pictures of Adora with two other people she gathers are called Glimmer and Bow, her  _ new  _ best friends, she thinks bitterly, she’s clearly popular at Bright Moon, just as she had been at Horde High, but she’s like some kind of next level shit at this school apparently because Catra can’t go two posts without seeing someone complimenting Adora - it’s so fucking corny. 

There’s a picture of Adora in her football uniform, she looks good, god, she always looked good, her arm is slung around Bow’s neck and she’s grinning triumphantly, he’s smiling just as brightly and Catra is struck by a feeling of jealousy. 

Adora is happy. She really is. Without Catra. And she’s fucking miserable. Really. 

Then she sees a post that makes her breath catch. ‘I miss you.’ Catra knows that’s for her and it pisses her off beyond belief. She grips her phone so tight she worries she might shatter the screen if she presses any harder but all her anger and hatred is bubbling and she can’t control it. But there’s a softer voice, the one that she usually ignored, that whispers back so softly.

_ I miss you too. _


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You don’t really talk about her much." Bow says carefully. "I mean, enough for me to know about her but not enough for me to really know much, you know?" Adora shrugs. 
> 
> "She's my best friend." Adora replies, then a pause, before she shakes her head. "Or at least, she was."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter for y'all. Honestly, I kind of love writing this so I don't think I'm gonna stop, I've got some gems coming up too that I'm excited to write and share! Anyway, hope y'all enjoy! Thank you for the kudos and comments on the last chapter!

Adora stirs awake, slowly blinking her eyes open. Then, like a jack in the box, she springs up, dramatically glancing at her clock which read 7am in big red block numbers. Adora scrambles to her feet but she somehow gets tangled and falls gracelessly onto her face with a loud thump. "Ow." She groans, pushing herself up with her arms, she kicks her feet free of her duvet, which had been the cause of her tumble, and stands to her feet, running a hand through her bangs which had escaped where she tied them back. 

That's when the door flung open to her room, hitting the wall with an audible bang and Adora yelps, jumping at the sudden intrusion, to see Glimmer glaring at her with a serious case of bed hair. "What the  _ hell  _ Adora?" She asks and her scowl is seriously scary. Glimmer is about the furthest thing from a morning person, she’s almost impossible to wake in the morning, even with school, and she hates having her sleep being interrupted. 

"Sorry!" Adora exclaims but when she sees Glimmer grimace at her loud tone she lowers her voice a little. "Sorry, I slept in." Adora says, frowning at herself, she never usually slept in. 

"No you didn’t," Glimmer says, pointing to the computer on the desk in the corner of the room. "your alarm clock is fast, you probably need to change the batteries or something." Adora trudges across the room and squints at the tiny clock on the computer and grins. It was in fact 6 am and Adora hadn’t slept in. She wastes no time grabbing for her sweatshirt and joggers all while Glimmer dramatically yawns to emphasise how tired she was and grumbles to show how annoyed she was. 

"I don’t understand how you can get up at this God forsaken hour and go jogging," Glimmer scrunches up her nose and Adora chuckles as she laced up her running shoes. "I can barely walk downstairs to get breakfast." 

"You're forgetting something," Adora says, walking past Glimmer to the stairs. "I'm a jock." With that Adora bounds down the stairs. 

"Gross." She hears Glimmer call after her before she hears a door closing signalling that Glimmer had gone back to sleep - she could probably get another hour in if she tried. Adora opens the front door and breaks out into a jog immediately. It's not that Adora necessarily needed these morning jogs to keep in shape, her football drills pretty much covered that, but she liked them, it cleared her mind, in the weeks leading up to her being fostered by Angella and Micah Adora had ran an unhealthy amount because of... Catra. Adora shakes her head. She hates even after all this time, after all these months of Catra pretending like she didn’t exist, her mind always -  _ always  _ \- came back to her. It's like she was incapable of thinking of anything else, just Catra. 

Adora, admittedly, was a little pissed at her. She understood why Catra was angry, really, she did, living in that house with Weaver… it sends a chill down her spine and she feels her stomach do nervous flips just thinking about it, but it's not like Adora had a choice. Was she just supposed to say no thanks when a loving family offered her a new home? It was near impossible to find a permanent home when you were in your late teens, she hadn’t wanted to leave Catra, in fact, she’d been so worried about that fact she’d put off telling her until the very last minute which, admittedly, wasn’t her finest decision. 

Adora huffs and watches her breath condense in the air, the weather was starting to get that pleasant fall chill, after a sweltering summer it was a nice change of pace, it was also one of her favourite times of the year as well as Catra's. Catra. Why couldn't Adora just let it go? Catra obviously wanted nothing to do with her, the fact that she hadn’t replied to Adora's numerous texts was a clear enough message and yet she still held out that little shred of hope. 

Like she was running on autopilot, Adora finds herself passing Horde High. School was obviously not in session, it was far too early, even the Horde wasn’t as cruel to make students come in at 6:30 am, but Adora could still picture Catra sitting at her desk at the back of the class, her feet up on the back of whoever was unfortunate enough to sit in front of her, her pencil twirled around a strand of her hair as she listened only half heartedly to whatever the teacher was saying, mostly she just doodled in the margins of her notes and she’d just borrow Adora's later if she missed something super important. Adora had always kind of loved Catra's laid back nature, not that she was lazy mind you, in fact Adora was pretty sure Catra was the most hard working and smartest person Adora had ever met, she had simply just perfected the art of showing indifference, of being able to enjoy the moment without stressing, which Adora envied; she was always,  _ constantly _ , in a state of anxiety about anything. 

She stops, feeling overwhelmed, she bends over in order to catch her breath. She examines Horde High again, she’d spent pretty much her entire life there, she knew it like the back of her hand, could probably tell you what was written in every bathroom stall and when she had been there she’d been happy, at least, as happy as she could be, Catra was a big part of that, but after being at Bright Moon, even for as little as she had been, Horde High kind of seemed like a prison in comparison - one she'd left Catra to endure. Adora clenches her fists, then she takes off again. It was no use thinking about that. What was done was done. If Catra wanted to ignore her then that was her choice, even though Adora knew, if Catra asked, she’d come running back.

** _//_ **

When Adora comes downstairs, after getting showered and changed, she sees Glimmer sitting at the kitchen island with her face down on the cool surface while Angella whooshed around the kitchen fixing them up breakfast. Glimmer was groaning dramatically and the sound of the front door clicking shut signalled Bow's entrance. "Good morning!" He beams and Adora smiles while shoving an apple into her mouth. 

"Ugh!" Glimmer complains only sparking Bow to chuckle at his lifelong best friend. "You and Adora are both freaks of nature, no one should be this happy on a morning." Glimmer says. Adora goes to protest that fact but Angella interrupts, she pinches Bow’s cheek and tells him good morning which was highly endearing. Bow settles next to Glimmer at the island and begins pulling the varied foods Angella had made for them to eat onto his plate. 

"Come on Glim, today is Adora's first game as quarterback for the Rebels." Bow smiles at her and Adora ducks her head. Truthly, she was kind of a nervous wreck over that and she was trying to compartmentalise it so she didn’t have a nervous breakdown while trying to eat her morning apple - Glimmer does seem to brighten a little at the reminder however. 

"It’s just a friendly game against some local school, no biggie, no sweat, I got this." 

"Yeah you do!" Bow exclaims, hopping off his stool to sling his arms around both Glimmer and Adora's necks in an affectionate hug sort of thing. "Man, I remember seeing you play when you were with the Horde, that was something." Bow says wistfully. Adora blushes, she thinks it's weird that Bow and Glimmer had seen her play before, the only person Adora had ever noticed in those packed bleachers had been Catra. She remembers once Catra had blown her a playful kiss and Adora had tripped over her own feet - later Catra had called her a nerd for it. 

The Horde and the Rebels were bitter rivals, no one really knew why anymore, it was a feud which had began before their time but had been passed down generation after generation. Adora had been on the receiving end of that rivalry on the Horde, she was not looking forward to playing against them as a Rebel. She wonders if Catra would come to that game but of course she wouldn't because the only reason she ever came before was because of Adora. 

It had taken a while for Adora to earn the trust of her fellow Rebels, though Bow and Glimmer had been more than supportive during her transitional period, not that Glimmer had a choice since Adora lived with her and all, but she’d slipped into their duo seamlessly and they were now a trio which Bow had dubbed Best Friend Squad - god, Catra would've hated that name. Bow and Glimmer were drastically different to who her friends had been back at the Horde but, then again, she’d only really had one friend. Sure she’d been close with Lonnie, Kyle and Rogelio before she left (since Scorpia and Entrapta were new she hadn’t really gotten to know them before she’d been fostered) but Catra was her one and only true friend. She remembers them in their little pillow fort one night, probably around seven, shoulder to shoulder, promising to always be friends, to stay together, Adora had meant that promise and, even if Adora had technically left, she didn’t see why that had to stop their friendship. Catra was just being difficult. 

She hears Bow distantly talking about her football skills but Adora opens up her phone and goes to her texts, she’d stopped trying to reach out because Catra was clearly not interested in responding but maybe now she would be? Adora sighs. Every read and unanswered text was like a stab to the heart, she wasn’t certain she could handle another one. Maybe that was a bad idea. She locks her phone and focuses back in on the conversation. "... my dads said they were really proud of my archery skills." 

"That's amazing Bow!" Glimmer says happily, wrapping her arms around his neck in a big hug. 

"Yeah,' He chuckles, a big bright smile on his face. "I wish I'd told them sooner about joining," He looked guilty at that and Adora felt a pang of hurt at the expression - seeing Bow unhappy was like seeing a kicked puppy: absolutely awful. "but you guys were right, I should've been honest from the start." Adora pats him on his shoulder affectionately and he smiles softly. 

"Okay," Angella cuts into the conversation. "if you don’t leave now you're all going to be late." Glimmer didn’t seem too pleased to be reminded that they had to actually go to school. "Adora," Angella says, looking at her. Angella had a tendency to be a tad bit intense if Adora was honest, she was sure it wasn't intentional but all the same. "I need to speak to you,  _ alone _ ." Adora is instantly on alert. She knows that Angella is a good person but living with Shadow Weaver left Adora with a few…  _ issues _ . Her stomach instantly felt on edge, she felt like she might throw up out of sheer anxiety. 

Bow and Glimmer bid her farewell and go to wait in the car for her before Adora concentrates fully on Angella. "I'm really proud of you,"  _ Wow _ ,  _ okay _ , Adora had not been expecting  _ that _ . She’s never had someone say that to her, not even Shadow Weaver who liked to parade around her star quarterback, and Adora knew she was treated differently to those in the home but differently didn’t mean better. Any affection Shadow Weaver showed her wasn’t real, it was just a way to manipulate her into doing whatever it was that she wanted and she wanted Adora to make herself look good, she never loved her, even if she pretended to. 

Angella reaches out and Adora instinctively flinches. Although Shadow Weaver had never hurt her physically, she’d witnessed her being a little heavy handed to Catra, grabbing her chin roughly to force her to look at her, or grabbing her arm so hard when she was a kid to stop Catra running that it had bruised for a week, that had been when they'd snuck into Weaver's room, she was very private, her room was off limits, but they were kids, kids do stupid stuff like that all the time. She remembers Catra's pained squeal and the terrified look in her eyes plain as day, she’d cried for hours afterwards, it was one of the worst memories Adora had, they never went into that room again. 

Of course, Angella saw Adora's internal panic and withdrew her hand immediately, not touching Adora, she was glad for that. "I'll see you at the game," She says with a soft smile instead and Adora feels herself relaxing, she returns the smile, just as softly, feeling at ease again, the painful butterflies gone from her stomach. Adora turns to leave after that, a little more pep in her step, but Angella's voice calls her back to attention. "And Adora," She says. "do try not to worry too much." Adora laughs nervously. She did have a tendency to be overly concerned, the inert need to be the best quarterback ever, one of those issues she inherited from her time under Weaver. It was nice to know that Angella would support her no matter what happened, even if she failed, she couldn't have said the same about Horde High and Weaver. 

"Yes ma'am." Adora says with an awkward salute and why did she do  _ that _ ? Angella gives her a puzzled expression back but before she can point out that Adora was already freaking out the blonde slips out the front door and jogs to the car waiting for her at the curb. 

** _//_ **

To say Bright Moon was completely different to Horde High would be an understatement. Horde High was a canvas of grey, it was dark and a little miserable, the school must have violated at least some health codes and there were even rumours that it had once been a prison but it had been repurposed - Adora always thought the claims were baseless but the windows of the toilet had bars on them which she always found suspicious. Bright moon was the complete opposite, there was no grey just a sea of pastel colours, even the students had that colour scheme going for them, Adora was probably the only one who didn’t have dyed hair or an elaborate sense of fashion. 

She came to school in her red and white varsity jacket, a t-shirt and her old worn favourite pair of jeans with high tops and she never changed her hair from its classic tight ponytail. It was comfortable and practical, why change that? Glimmer's style could only be described as glitter chic though it worked for her and her clothes always complimented her pastel pink hair, Bow favoured crop tops, most of which had a heart in the middle of them for some reason, along with some jeans that sat on his hips showing off a generous amount of his abdomen. Adora was kind of surprised that was allowed, in the Horde if you wore something like that, girl or boy, they'd drag you into the principal's office and force you to cover up. Bright moon was much more liberal, in every way really, it made going to school a little less like a chore but it was still school. 

Luckily for the Best Friend Squad, by some miracle their lockers were all beside one another Adora had a suspicion that Angella had something to do with that but she couldn't say for certain. Adora was absentmindedly listening to Glimmer complain about how much she hated math, which Adora could certainly agree with, while also simultaneously thinking of her plays. She was itching to go practice, or something more productive than sitting through hours of  _ not  _ physical activity, that stressed Adora out more, she liked being active, being active allowed her to vent her stress, she was never one to sit around to relax. 

A hand being waved in front of her face brings Adora back to reality. "Adora? Helloooo?" Glimmer asks. When Adora focused on her properly she sees Glimmer giving her a look of pure concern, her hands on her hips. "Were you even listening?" She asks with a frown. 

"What? Yeah,  _ pfffft, totally _ ." Adora rambles but when Bow and Glimmer look at one another she knows she not fooling anyone. 

"You're a terrible liar." Glimmer deadpans and Adora sighs - she’s really the worst at lying, she can’t protest that point. 

"You're really stressed." Bow says, he looks significantly upset at that point, like he was upset they hadn’t noticed just how stressed Adora was. He comes behind the blonde and begins massaging her shoulders which, usually, she would melt at but she’s far too worked up. "Your shoulders!" He calls, scandalised, with his usual voice crack. 

" _ Ha _ !" Adora says nervously, waving him off with her hand. "I'm fine guys, nothing to worry about." Adora begins walking speedily towards home room, Bow and Glimmer come up beside her. 

"I've never seen you so stressed." Bow says. 

"This happens all the time." Adora says dismissively but that seems to upset Bow more. 

"What did you used to do to relax before a game?" Glimmer inquires, genuinely curious, and Adora blushes at the memory. 

"Catra and I had, like, this pre-game ritual." Adora confesses. Glimmer and Bow exchange glances which only serves to make Adora more nervous. 

"You don’t really talk about her much." Bow says carefully. "I mean, enough for me to know about her but not enough for me to really know much, you know?" Adora shrugs. 

"She's my best friend." Adora replies, then a pause, before she shakes her head. "Or at least, she was." 

"Only your friend?" Glimmer asks skeptically. "The way you said she reacted, and how you talk about her, kind of sounds like she’s an ex but not of the friend variety." Adora blows air out of her mouth in a dismissive ‘pffft’. Truthfully, Glimmer had just exposed her deepest secret. She’d been completely in love with Catra but that terrified her to no end, at first she’d kind of been oblivious about it, but, as time went on, she knew she didn't view Catra with complete platonic affection - a lot of it was very  _ un- _ platonic actually - but she’d lost hope of Catra ever feeling the same way. So she’d bottled her emotions up and stayed friends because at least that way she could still have Catra in her life, except now she didn’t have her at all. 

"It’s complicated." Adora brushes off. 

"Well," Bow says cheerfully. "I'm sure between Glimmer and I we can come up with something to help ease your stress." Adora looks at them both, their bright eyes and soft smiles warm her heart. 

"Thanks guys." Adora says, already relaxing - at least a little. She could always rely on Bow and Glimmer to get her through rough spots.

** _//_ **

When the final bell finally sounded Adora has never raced so fast to get out of class before - she’d also never gotten dressed as fast. She still had a couple of hours before the game but she wanted to get in as much practice for the game as possible and make sure she was completely warmed up for it. If she had still been at the Horde, Catra would have dragged her away from the field, from running drills, and told her to relax  _ 'Stop being so uptight Adora, you'll pop a vein' _ she’d said it more times than Adora could count. The way Catra got her to relax was just by being around, Catra was a huge distraction, one Adora could never ignore, and when she did find her mind running into anxiety over her game plan Catra was always there to remind her to loosen up, they kind of had this ritual of going to a local diner and having pancakes, probably not advisable if you're about to play a football game, but it never failed to calm Adora's nerves. 

Now, thinking about Catra made Adora's stomach swoop uncomfortably and it made her feel more anxious, more apprehensive, she never thought that would have ever happened, Catra had always been Adora’s safe place, now, well, Adora didn’t know. " _ Ugh _ !" She growls and kicks the football in front of her so hard it goes soaring through the air and plumates down on the other side of the field. It wasn’t fair. Maybe Adora had abandoned Catra but she’d tried to reach out and Catra just ignored her. Adora had thought she just needed time, space, just some time to adjust, Adora could understand that, but as the months went on and Catra ignored her texts it became clear that this was not just a passing grudge, Catra was really mad at her, like seriously angry, they'd had arguments and disagreements in the past, everyone always did, but it was never like this, Adora had never felt empty and her heart never clenched painfully in her chest at the thought of Catra. Adora was angry too, at Catra’s attitude, at her willingness to throw away years of friendship over something Adora barely had control over, she couldn’t have stayed even if she really didn’t want to leave Catra behind, maybe it wasn’t too late and she could convince Angella to take in another stray but she knew that wasn’t possible. 

So Adora runs drills by herself, somewhere along the way Bow and Glimmer show up with snacks and water which Adora appreciates but before long the bleachers are filling up and Adora is forced to abandon her workout to go get her kit on. When she joins her teammates out on the field the pleasant ache from her workout keeps her grounded, she sees Sea Hawk doing ridiculous stretches as a warm up. Adora checks her cleats are all laced up correctly, the last thing she needed was to trip over an untied lace, before joining her teammates. Adora, Mermista, Spinnerella and Netossa made up the female teammates, everyone else was men, but by football standards that was a fair amount of estrogen. Some high schools didn’t allow it, they couldn’t outright say it but they’d just say the women didn’t qualify but, like Adora said, Bright Moon was much more liberal - plus they had a woman coach for crying out loud. 

When the players jog out onto the field Adora soaks in the cheers, she feels a familiar thrum in her chest, she feels taller, more confident, more powerful, she always freaked out before a game but on the field she was a natural, she was in her damn element. Angella gives them some speech about this being a friendly game and to have some fun with it, they weren’t playing competitively after all, then breaks. Adora glances over at the bleachers to see Bow and Glimmer in the first row. “WHOO! GO ADORA!” Bow yells so loudly, his familiar voice cracks, carrying over the noise of the crowd. Glimmer facepalms and looks a little embarrassed but she’s cheering just as loudly and holding a sign with Adora’s name on and Adora feels her heart sprout wings in her chest. She was so lucky she had Bow and Glimmer. 

To say it was just a friendly game, a lot of people had turned out, probably to see their new quarterback in action, Adora was new after all, both to school and the football team, but she was willing to prove herself, determined to really, and she had the support of her team fully. They form a circle around her and Adora grins. “Alright team! You heard Coach Angella, it’s just a friendly game, but that doesn’t mean we can’t kick their butts!” Adora says. 

“ _ Yes _ !” Sea Hawk yells excitedly. 

“Let’s show them what we’re made of!” Adora says loudly, clapping her hands to break the circle. 

“ _ Adventure _ !” Sea Hawk hollars and Adora rolls her eyes - he was always so full of energy, it must be exhausting Adora is sure. 

The game goes pretty well, Adora scoring two touchdowns herself, but in the second half, things start to go sideways. Adora was looking for her receiver to throw the ball to but when she couldn’t see him she began running, side stepping the opposing team, dodging them expertly, she finds a gap in players and breaks out into a sprint. She hears Bow calling her name and looks instinctively to the crowd, except she swears she sees a pair of familiar looking mismatched eyes in that crowd. She does a double take, stumbling over her feet, she swears she hadn’t imagined that but she also doesn’t see them again, at least, not until she’s slammed into by one of the opposition’s defenders that sends her tumbling to the ground harshly. Staring up at the sky, Adora’s left wondering if she had imagined those eyes or if Catra had actually been here, watching her. She’s not sure either thought gives her much comfort if she’s honest. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, idk much about American football other than what I see in media but Adora makes a hot quarterback jock so that's what she is. Leave kudos and or/comments and let me know your thoughts, please, I crave validation.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She knows she shouldn’t pretend to not care about them, or whatever, she just has a hard time expressing affection, the only person she had ever been able to express open affection for had been Adora, and that had ended up hurting Catra beyond belief, so it was better for her to keep people at arms length, to keep up her unamused facade, so as to protect herself for when they inevitably left her behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for the kudos and comments! I read them all. Hopefully y'all like this chapter, I guess I upload once a week on the weekend and that's my schedule idk. Anyway, I'm having fun with this and I hope y'all are too. Feel free to leave more kudos and comments! Enjoy!

Stupid. Catra had been so stupid. She doesn’t know why she thought it would be a good idea.  _ Hey Catra why don’t you just go to your ex-best friend's football game? She won’t even notice. _ Except Catra swore that she’d connected eyes with Adora, even if it had just been briefly, it was long enough to spark fear in Catra and make her flee. She’d never moved so fast, she shouldn't have even been there to begin with, she’d told herself that she had just been in the area, and just  _ somehow  _ navigated her way to Bright Moon, and figured what the hell and decided to go have a snoop, only to discover the football team were having a friendly game against a nearby school. 

Adora was number one, she had been at Horde High too, she was so easy for Catra to distinguish from the other players. It was kind of laughable, the fact that she knew who Adora was from her structure alone, maybe Catra had spent too much time noticing Adora's body then she was comfortable admitting but, then again, she had drawn her multiple times before. 

_ Yeah, that must have been why.  _

She was still a cocky show off on the field, she always had been, she was in her element down there, all eyes on Adora, everyone cheering her name, god, it was so dumb but Catra couldn't blame them for admiring their quarterback, she was hard not to admire, she even managed to get Shadow Weaver to appreciate her which was, honestly, impossible, at least, to Catra. Her jersey was white and her number was in gold but her pants were red as well as her helmet and the colour scheme really worked for her, Adora had always looked amazing in red, it made her blue eyes pop and her blonde hair shine and... Catra shakes her head. She has to stop thinking about Adora. Stupid jock Adora. Except, Catra's never been good at that. 

She jumps up to her feet when she hears the familiar footfalls of someone passing her door and she yanks it open and grabs a shoulder just before it passes by and drags the person into her room. She lets out a noise of surprise at the sudden kidnapping but, as soon as she’s in the room, she has this look on her face that makes Catra regret her decision. "I'm  _ borrrrred _ !" Catra groans, going to her bed, she dramatically flops backwards onto the bed. 

"I'm in your room!" Scorpia says excitedly, she does this little dance that Catra finds somewhat obnoxious and, really, it's a room, she doesn’t know what the big deal is. 

"Scorpia," Catra says, clicking her fingers. "focus." 

"Oh man," Scorpia says, sitting down on what was once Adora's bed. "I mean, I heard the carnage but I didn't see it." She's referring to the splintered wood of the headboard where Catra had taken a bat to it. Catra rolls her eyes and sighs so loudly that Scorpia manages to look at her, she still has a dopey grin on her face but Catra chooses to ignore that.

"Can we do something so I don't die of boredom?" Catra asks, stretching out on her bed. Then again, napping sounds kind of good right now. 

"You want to hang out," Scorpia says and she looks like she might be on the verge of tears. "with  _ me _ ?!" Catra groans. 

"Oh my God, stop being so  _ you  _ and just take me somewhere, I can't keep staring at these walls." _ I can't keep thinking about Adora.  _ She doesn't say it but it's what she means. 

Scorpia hops to her feet, the sudden movement causes the bed to creak a little and Catra raises her eyebrow at Scorpia's enthusiasm. Truly, she doesn’t understand why someone would be so excited to hang out with her but it’s Scorpia, Catra doesn’t understand half of the reasons she has for doing what she does. "We could totally go to the mall! Oh, it’ll be so much fun wildcat! I have to buy some new cleats anyway and we can get food and-" 

"Stop talking." Catra says, cutting off Scorpia's ranting while rubbing her temples. The mall. That actually doesn’t sound half bad. Catra needed to get some more art supplies anyway, plus she had quite a bit saved up from the commissions she did for people online, also, it would get her out of her damn room and force her to think about something other than a blonde jock, a win-win as they say. “Alright,” Catra says while standing up, she grabs her leather jacket from the back of her desk chair and shoves her arms into the sleeves. “let’s go.” Scorpia beams so wide it’s a little blinding. Catra resits the urge to roll her eyes, she supposes it’s nice that at least someone wants to hang out with her, plus, though she’d never tell her that out loud, Catra kind of enjoyed Scorpia’s company, they had a good dynamic, even if she really got on Catra’s nerves. 

Catra exits her room, Scropia in tow, and almost gets wiped out by a fast moving person and a flash of purple. “Hey! Watch it!” Catra grumbles and Entrapta turns to her, something metal in her hands and honestly Catra doesn’t want to know - she really doesn’t. 

“You’re going out?” Entrapta asks and she has this gleam in her eyes. She walks up to Catra with wide pleading eyes, entering her personal boundaries she’d tried (and failed) to set up with both Scorpia and Entrapta, she’d given up on them ever actually listening to that. “Could you pick me up another motherboard, I really  _ really  _ need it, for…  _ science _ !” Entrapta cackles and Catra swallows nervously. Entrapta kind of terrified her, she was like a mad scientist, constantly tinkering with devices, she was kind of like Frankenstein, it was only a matter of time before something insane emerged from her ‘lab’ (which was really just her room) not that nothing insane hadn’t already emerged from there before but seriously insane, like Frankenstein’s monster insane. 

“Uh,” Catra says, stepping back and pushing Entrapta gently backwards who looks at her expectantly. “no promises.” She responds. “Why don’t you just come?” Catra offers. Entrapta opens her mouth and then closes it again. She seems perplexed by the question, and really Catra hadn’t intended for it to be such a difficult question, but then she’s shaking her head. 

“It’s better if I stay here,” She wrings her hands nervously and Catra hates that it tugs a little at her heart - she’s meant to be heartless, she can’t show she actually  _ cares _ . “I make people nervous.” Catra can’t argue with that fact, Entrapta did make people nervous, but Catra was kind of used to it by now and screw what everyone else thought. 

“Come on Entrapta, you don’t have to worry about that with us.” Catra jabs her thumb in Scropia’s direction who was shaking, probably resisting the urge to grab them both in a group hug. For a moment, Entrapta seems to consider it, she pulls out a notepad and rambles too fast and quietly to herself Catra doesn’t manage to catch whatever it is that she’s saying. 

“No,” She says. “I think I’ll stay home, this time anyway.” Catra nods, accepting that, she wasn’t about to push Entrapta to do something she didn’t want to do. She turns abruptly on her heels, her long pigtails lashing behind her and almost whipping Catra. “Motherboard!” She hears Entrapta yell before her door snaps shut behind her. Catra sighs. She has the weirdest friends but she kind of loves them. 

She knows she shouldn’t pretend to not care about them, or whatever, she just has a hard time expressing affection, the only person she had ever been able to express open affection for had been Adora, and that had ended up hurting Catra beyond belief, so it was better for her to keep people at arms length, to keep up her unamused facade, so as to protect herself for when they inevitably left her behind. 

“Come on,” Catra says with a sigh, turning and heading towards the stairs. “we have a bus to catch.”

** _//_ **

Adora was having the time of her life. They’d been shopping at the mall for hours and, though Glimmer had tried to get Adora interested in wearing something ‘not tacky’, Adora had persisted in her need for food. So now the Best Friend Squad were in Adora’s favourite place in the world: the food court. This was where she’d blow half of her money, maybe more, and she wouldn’t even regret it. She wasn’t one to really care about clothes, or make up, or any of that nonsense, but when it came to food she was very serious. 

Bow and Glimmer were giving her some serious looks of concern when Adora practically inhaled her cinnamon rolls. “What?” Adora asks around a half eaten roll to which Glimmer grimaces at and lets out a ‘Gross’ under her breath. 

“I don’t understand how you can eat so much and still be so fit.” Bow says seriously and Adora laughs, taking sips of her chocolate vanilla milkshake. 

“It’s an art.” Adora replies and Glimmer hums. 

“So,” Glimmer states. “do you feel better?” She asks, narrowing her eyes suspiciously, and Adora suddenly finds it hard to swallow. They had won the friendly game but Adora had been kicking herself over that fumble in the second half, she had been so stupid to believe Catra had actually been there, why on earth would she have been? It probably wasn’t a good sign that Adora was seeing her ex-best friend in random places where she hadn’t been. Adora had played it off as getting distracted, she didn’t want anyone thinking she was crazy, seeing things that weren’t possible and all that, but she was disappointed in herself for losing focus like that. 

“I have cinnamon rolls and you guys, nothing could be better.” Adora answers dismissively. 

“Glad to hear it’s not just cinnamon rolls that make you happy.” Bow says playfully and Adora chuckles. She slows her roll a little with her food, she didn’t want to choke after all, that might be slightly embarrassing. 

Even though she knew she probably imagined those eyes on her at the game, Adora couldn’t stop thinking about the possibilities of Catra actually being there. What would that mean if she had been there? Adora had been trying the whole mad thing but she’s not sure she really is mad, maybe more hurt than anything, desperate to know what Catra is thinking. Part of her hoped there would be some opportunity for reconciliation, if Catra were willing. 

Adora feels her stomach churn a little and she starts regretting the fact that she’d stuffed her face so relentlessly. “Hey guys, I’m going to,” Adora scoots out from her booth, shouldering her backpack. “I’m just going to the bathroom one sec.” Adora chuckles nervously but doesn’t give the pair much of a chance to reply before she’s hurriedly walking in the direction of the nearby bathroom. She needed to get Catra out of her head, seriously, this was not healthy, she was almost obsessively thinking about her. 

Adora pushes the door to the bathroom open and sighs with relief when she sees it’s empty. She steps in front of the mirror and sighs, she rests her hands on the side and stares herself down. “Adora, get a grip.” She grumbles. She continues to berate herself for being such an idiot in her inability to let Catra go.

** _//_ **

The mall wasn’t busy, thank god, Catra had little tolerance for groups of people, they always rubbed her the wrong way. Scropia had been talking the entire time, Catra had no idea how she hadn't ran out of things to say an hour ago. They’d managed to find a motherboard for Entrapta, though Catra wasn’t certain it was actually a motherboard, she was guessing here, and Catra had picked up some art supplies while Scorpia had gotten the cleats she needed for football. 

They were minding their own business getting pretzels when Catra felt someone shove her shoulder harshly from behind her. She turns, ready to rip whoever had done that a new one, but falters when she sees who it is. It’s Octavia. They’d always had this bitter relationship, probably because Octavia had bullied her back in pre-school, she was older but she’d been held back a couple of years meaning they were now in the same grade. Octavia was like Scorpia levels of buff however and Catra was kind of scrawny, she always had been, she’d never really filled out, not like her peers, she just had to accept that maybe she never would, it also didn’t help that Octavia was super tall, Catra thought she was average height but between Scorpia and Octavia she looked like she was twelve. 

“What is your problem?” Catra asks, absently handing Scropia her bag of art supplies and pretzel. 

“I’m surprised Weaver let you out.” Octavia says with amusement, her tone dripping with smugness and Catra clenches her fists in response. She hates being made fun of, always has, always will, she hates bullies, they suck, plus she’s having kind of a rotten day, it had been going kind of smoothly since she got here and now Octavia was ruining it with her stupid face. Scorpia, sensing Catra’s growing frustration and anger, reaches a hand out and puts it on her shoulder. 

“Maybe we should go Catra.” She says quietly. Catra clenches her jaw, she knows Scorpia is right but she’s stubborn and she doesn’t want to look like a coward. 

“You really shouldn’t skip classes.” The goons flanking either side of Octavia snicker at her words and Catra feels something hot simmer under her skin. 

"You're just a snitch Octavia!" Catra snaps, knocking Scorpia's hand off of her shoulder and stepping towards Octavia and her goons. She’d always been impulsive and quick to anger, it was one of her less desirable qualities she’d been told - Weaver had said it several times. 

"Maybe you should control her." Octavia says to Scorpia who takes a sharp breath in in a gasp because Scorpia knows that was  _ not  _ the right thing to say. Catra was sick of being everyone's problem, she was her own damn person, her own responsibility, not Adora's and certainly not Scorpia's, why should anyone control her? Her anger gets the better of her, as it so often did, and she lunges at Octavia before anyone really knows what's happening. 

She lands a solid punch to the girl's eye causing her to yell in alarm, Scorpia grabs her two goons to prevent them from ganging up on Catra. The thing was, despite landing that solid punch, Catra is skinny, she’s fast and she can punch hard but Octavia is much more muscle mass to her, like a  _ lot _ , so when she lands a blow to her ribs Catra yelps and feels all air leave her lungs. It throws her so off balance that Octavia manages to punch her right on the nose and suddenly blood is spilling everywhere. It's like a damn horror movie. 

Scorpia yells in horror, it's so dramatic, like something right out of a telenovela or some shit, but the security guard yelling causes Octavia and her goons to split leaving Catra cradling her nose, tears gathering in her eyes at the stinging of the punch. "Catra are you okay?!" Scorpia sounds downright hysterical, Catra's more concerned that she was getting blood on one of her favourite tank tops. "Oh my god! Oh my god? What do I do? Do you need mouth to mouth? Do I call an ambulance?! I feel like I'm going to faint." 

"I'm  _ fine _ !" Catra snaps, though she cringes at the plain that shoots through her. She swats Scorpia out of her space and groans. "I'm going to go clean myself up, wait here." Catra storms towards the bathroom because of course this would happen today of all days. Like her life wasn’t shit enough. The security guard starts questioning Scorpia as Catra makes her way to the nearby bathroom still clutching her nose and leaning her head back. She stumbles her way there, if she’s honest she’s not that big of a fan of blood, well, she’s not a fan of seeing her  _ own  _ blood, she had no issues with other people. 

She grumbles before entering the bathroom, hoping that it was empty so she could mope in peace, except when she pushes the door open she sees a very familiar looking blonde standing at the sink. 

** _//_ **

Adora continues to give herself a pep talk when she hears the sudden intrusion of someone shoving the door open. She coughs a couple of times, trying to hide the fact that she had been talking to herself and begins running the water to pretend she had been washing her hands. Nothing weird about that. She doesn’t pay the intruder much mind until she hears a weird strangled noise and turns to see a whole lot of red as well as blue and golden eyes staring at her wide. 

Adora does a double take, not quite believing what she was seeing, but then Catra is smirking, despite the fact that she’s covered in blood and holding her nose, she fucking  _ smirks,  _ and she places a hand on her hip in that cocky self confident way she so often did. "Hey Adora." She says, that familiar lilt to her voice. Adora pulls her hands from the water and turns to the brunette who walks towards her slowly and purposely. 

"Catra." Adora says, swallowing thickly. Catra snorts then yelps at the action. 

"Shit." She hisses, turning towards the mirror. Adora sees her wobble on her feet a little, Catra always hated seeing her own blood. 

"What happened?" Adora asks. 

"Like you care." Catra retorts, turning her faucet on. Adora narrows her eyes. That was uncalled for. "Shit, I think it's broken." She mumbles to herself. 

"How can you tell? You have your hand on it." Adora says. Catra rolls her eyes in the way she always did. 

"I can feel it doofus." 

" _ Hey _ !" Adora protests. "Let me see." Adora says, ignoring Catra's comment and grabbing her elbow. Catra recoils sharply at the sudden touch and Adora can’t lie, it stings a little, they had once been so affectionate, they always used to touch one another, constantly, even when studying in class they'd link their feet together under their desks, or have their shoulders pressed together when side by side, now Catra was acting like Adora's touch burned her. 

Catra growls, probably from the pain the sudden action causes, and Adora feels her frown deepen. She opens a stall door aggressively, maybe a little more than she should have, and grabs a roll of toilet roll, she takes off her varsity jacket and puts it on the side next to the sink. She can see Catra watching her in the mirror the whole time. "Let me see." Adora says again. This time, she doesn’t touch Catra, she just gives her a look of steel, like she wasn’t taking no for an answer. "Which one of us has had a football to the face more times than they can count?" Adora asks pointedly. She can see Catra hesitate but then she gives in and turns to Adora looking like a sulking child. 

"Probably why you're so dumb, too many blows to the head." Catra grumbles and Adora gets her revenge when she touches Catra's nose and she hisses in pain. 

"Don’t talk." Adora states. Catra, to Adora's genuine surprise, shuts her mouth. Adora shoos her hands away and Catra drops them to her sides, she’d managed to stop the bleeding at least and when Adora touches the bone it didn’t seem displaced which meant she most likely just had a bust nose, nothing was broken. Still, Adora started cleaning the blood away with wet toilet paper, dabbing as gently as she could. She was so close to Catra, she wasn’t sure why she was so nervous, maybe it was that she was helping her ex best friend in the bathroom of a mall but there was something else to it, she felt something in her stomach, maybe she’d always felt that around Catra, maybe she hadn’t noticed until now. She swears she’s never seen Catra so pointedly and interested in bathroom walls before but it's like she refuses to look at her. 

"So," Adora says, discarding some bloody tissues for new ones. "are you going to tell me how this happened?" Catra finally looks at her and Adora suddenly feels so nervous that she takes extra interest in concentrating on cleaning Catra up. 

"I tripped." Catra replies. Adora huffs in frustration. "Fine, if you're gonna be a baby about it," Catra says. "I got into a fight with Octavia." 

"What is it with you and her?" 

"She has a stupid face!" Catra defends and Adora laughs, genuinely, which seems to surprise Catra because her eyes widen a little. It's so painfully familiar, Adora had patched Catra up on several occasions because, unfortunately, she so often did get into fights, especially with Octavia, but it worked both ways. Once, when Adora had been knocked off her feet too hard during a game, she’d gotten a concussion, Catra had ran onto the field and threatened everyone within Adora’s immediate vicinity. She spent the entire night keeping watch on her, and making sure she didn’t die, because apparently, who else would carry all her books around school? Adora was sure it was because Catra liked her but she refused that being true. 

She swears she sees the corners of Catra's lips twitch but it's too fast for her to know for sure. "It’s not broken." Adora decides, she shoves tissue up her nose just to help stop any blood that might be in it. "It is, however, bust and that sucks." 

"You should see the other guy." Catra responds and Adora rolls her eyes. 

"Take off your shirt." Adora says and Cayta raises a brow. 

"At least buy me dinner first." she responds coolly and it takes Adora a moment to realise what she’d just said. 

"No! I mean, I  _ meant _ , take your shirt off it’s covered in blood," That honestly didn’t sound any better. "I mean, change your shirt, I have a spare if you want." Catra chuckles. 

"Relax princess," She teases, she brushes Adora's collarbone with her fingers and Adora gulps at the heat she feels creeping up her neck. "I'm just joking." 

" _ Ha-ha _ ." Adora replies sarcastically. 

"I'm good on the whole shirt thing," She says, zipping her leather jacket up, god, Adora had missed that thing, Catra wore it everywhere and boy did it really work for her.  _ Wait, what? Work for her? What do you mean Adora?!  _

"Can we talk?" Adora blurts. Catra looks away now, her usual flirty and teasing personality disappearing. She turns away from Adora, looking towards the exit. 

"I don’t think that's a good idea." Catra says. 

"Come on Catra, it's been months, I  _ miss  _ you." Adora reaches out for her again but Catra moves so quickly Adora is stunned when she feels fingers circling her wrist, enough pressure to be firm but not enough to cause pain. 

Her eyes are intense, angry Adora realises, maybe she'd said the wrong thing? She'd just been trying to reach out. "Don't you get it Adora?" Catra spits. "I don't want to talk, I don't want to do anything with you again." Adora feels her chest tighten in pain. Catra releases her wrist and glances at the bathroom door looking like she wanted to make a swift exit. "You left me, end of story. I think it would be best if we just forgot about each other." 

"I cant!" Adora cries and maybe she should keep herself together for this conversation but she can't help it. "You're my best friend Catra, please, we can fix this, I know we can." Catra shakes her head, wavering on her feet, before she gives Adora an icy stare. She feels the knife in her heart from the stare alone but she knows whatever Catra is about to say next is going to twist the knife further into her heart. 

"Not anymore, there's nothing left to fix." With that she heads to the bathroom exit and pauses. "Later Adora." She says before pushing the door open and leaving just as quickly as she had swept into the room. 

Adora grapes at the space Catra had just been stood. She wasn’t right was she? Surely she didn’t actually feel that way? Adora knew she was deeply hurt and betrayed by her leaving but to say such cruel things... did Catra really mean them? Or was she just lashing out like she always did? Adora honestly didn’t know and that was kind of sad if she was honest. She stands there, gaping for a few moments more, before she grabs her varsity jacket and backpack again. Bow and Glimmer were waiting for her, she could think about that heartbreak later.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For a moment they stand in semi awkward silence, the only sound between them the rustling of nearby trees, and the scraping of wheels on pavement from the skate park, Catra signs at the cool breeze that manages to slip under her hood and into her hair. "Are you..." Adora trails off, probably thinking better of what she was about to ask. "What are you doing here?" She asks instead and Catra has to resist the urge to roll her eyes at the lame attempt to start a conversation. 
> 
> "Oh, you know, sightseeing," Catra replies coolly, earning her a scowl of annoyance from Adora. "what? Can’t a girl just come to the skate park?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter! Enjoy!

Miraculously, Weaver didn’t say anything about Catra's busted nose, she just shaked her head in disappointment, which, in a way, is kind of totally worse. What's even worse than Weaver's silent disapproval is that Catra had gone to the mall to get Adora out of her head, only to run into the very person she had been trying to avoid, and now she couldn't look at her stupid bruised face without thinking about the dumb blonde wiping blood from her nose ever so gently; if Catra closed her eyes and concentrated, she could still feel the ghost of Adora's soft touch. 

Forgetting about Adora was going about as well as Catra figured it would, like a wound that wouldn't heal, like she had an open wound that would never heal, just fester and get worse and worse. Maybe Adora didn’t deserve her anger, maybe she did, Catra was having a hard time seeing past her anger - again, one of her biggest flaws. Adora hadn’t attempted to reach out to Catra since their little run in, which Catra had half expected she  _ might _ , maybe what Catra had said had cut the few threads that still connected them, maybe Adora was done with her forever now, somehow that thought was worse than the pain Catra felt over her leaving. 

She couldn't let Adora go. She’d accepted that. And maybe she’d accepted that she’d always kind of been a little in love with her best friend, which sucked big time, because they had been  _ best friends, _ Catra has never -  _ will  _ never - trust anyone more than she trusts -  _ trusted  _ \- Adora. She’d been terrified to admit it to herself but with the space created by Adora leaving she knew it was true. The ache of her absence was stronger than the ache of her ribs from Octacia's punch. 

"Catra." Catra sits up ramrod straight in her desk chair. She hadn’t heard the woman enter, she swore sometimes Weaver just materialised out of the shadows, it wouldn't surprise Catra, she gave her those kind of vibes, like evil sadistic vibes. "I'm here to inform you about the SATs." 

"Oh my God," Catra rolls her eyes suddenly feeling her rebellious nature spark up inside her again. "why do you care? You always said I'd amount to nothing, what's the point in even taking them?" Catra doesn’t bother to turn to look at her but she knows Weaver must be seething by the sudden alarm Catra feels. She can’t explain it, it's like a shift in the very atmosphere itself, it's like she can feel Weaver's rage dissolve into the air around her creating a darkness that sets Catra's alarm bells off, if she had been small, back in her early years of seven, that comment might have earned her a clap over the back of the head, and she’d probably be shaking with fear, but now, Catra had built up a tolerance to Weaver’s threats. With Adora around she’d grown, not comfortable but, more bold perhaps because Adora afforded her a certain safety net when it came to Shadow Weaver - plus Catra had grown used to her words and actions in those years - but Adora wasn’t here anymore. 

" _ Stand _ ." Weaver’s voice is flat, unnaturally so, yet demanding enough that all rebellious nature drains out of Catra and she finds herself rising to her feet despite herself. She turns to face Weaver and her breath catches. She hates that she’s so afraid of this woman but she is. 

Weaver glides towards her ominously, kind of like she’s floating, and stops just short of Catra. She extends her hand and Catra flinches instinctively, ready for a palm to the cheek or something for her back talk, but instead she feels Shadow Weaver toy with one of her curls that had escaped from behind her headband and Catra opens her eyes in shock. "Catra," She still sounds disappointed, she has this tone, but it's one of her softer tones, at least the softest she’s used with Catra. "a scout from Greyskull College is coming to see your work within the week, you never told me you'd applied." Catra had applied but she’d never expected to actually get enough attention to gain a visit. 

"I-" She swallows thickly, glancing around the room, despite the fact Weaver was being somewhat gentle with her it made her feel on edge even more than when she was being aggressive, at least that way Catra knew what to expect, but this, she had no idea what to do with this version of Weaver, or what to expect. "I did apply but my… I didnt think my grades were good enough." Catra finds herself being honest and she doesn’t know why. How can Weaver do that to her? Usually she could have -  _ can  _ \- brush anyone off, be indifferent to anyone, but not Weaver. She simultaneously hates her and loves her, both craves and detests her attention, it's all very confusing to Catra but somehow Weaver knows how to press the right buttons, well, mostly anyway. 

She releases the curl, and briefly traces her fingers over Catra's jaw, before she steps back and Catra suddenly feels like she can breathe again. "Yes, well, they were impressed well enough with your art that they've requested a visit to meet you and see some of your work." Weaver says. "You would do well to not disappoint me, your behaviour reflects upon me and I will not have anyone believe I tolerate such flippant... delinquency." Catra takes a sharp breath in. It's like she’s been sucker punched in the gut, like she was reliving that punch Octavia gave her to the ribs which had sucked all the air out of her lungs. 

It’s such a Weaver thing to do, to give a compliment, but one that's backhanded with an insult, one that reminds Catra of her place, of what Weaver thinks of her. She remembers what she’d called her over the years: low life, waste of space, inadequate,  _ worthless _ . Pretty much every synonym for ‘you're the worst’ you could imagine. Catra hadn’t cared, well, she had cared but she’d always had someone who at least saw her value: Adora. Adora had always encouraged Catra's art, her compliments had never been backhanded, she’d always been completely honest and sincere, Adora had been the one person who'd been able to pull her out of these dark places, especially those caused by Weaver, but Adora was no longer an option, all Catra had was this constant darkness and she felt like she was suffocating. 

"Why they're interested in someone who has zero work ethic and no future I'll never know." Catra clenches her fists tight, so tight that she feels her nails dig into the palms of her hands, maybe even drawing blood. She bites her tongue, though she feels something dangerous brew on the tip of it. She knows, one day, she’s not going to be able to hold this back, that she’s going to do something that results in Weaver being justified in kicking her out, she’s always been able to walk that line, and even when she may have crossed it in the past Adora had been here and it had been okay, but now there was nothing stopping Weaver, she just needed Catra to give her a reason and it was ‘ Adiós  Catra!’, she wouldn't even think twice. 

"I have to go." Catra says, she goes to move past Weaver but her arm is seized suddenly and Catra yelps at the sudden pressure. It's quite painful actually, not that that's ever stopped Weaver in the past. 

"You will not walk away from me until you are dismissed." Weaver says and Catra roughly pulls her arm free, though the woman's nails break her skin when she does it. She whirls on the woman, feeling her eyes burn with unshed tears, and heat simmering under her skin, but as soon as she sees her the fire dies, snuffed out by whatever it was Weaver had over her, Catra can’t even explain it, really, just that Weaver has some inexplicable power over her, one she may never fully escape. 

"Sorry," Catra reluctantly grumbles, hanging her head. 

"Adora is lucky she escaped when she did," Weaver says in that stupid tone of disapproval and Catra feels her heart tighten at the mention of Adora. "you would have dragged her down with you." It stings. A lot. Weaver hit her right on that festering wound and it hurt so fucking much. 

She decides to keep her mouth shut and just stands, staring at the ground, until some small mercy happens. "You are dismissed but remember your curfew." Weaver grunts out before walking past Catra again. Catra takes a minute to gather herself, she takes deep slow breaths before she grabs an oversized hoodie off of her desk chair and grabs her bag. She exits her room and sees Scorpia and Lonnie eyeing her from the doorway of their shared bedroom. 

" _ What _ ?" Catra snaps. Lonnie rolls her eyes and mumbles something to Scorpia before she goes into their room. Scorpia gives her a look of pure sympathy that makes Catra's stomach twist uncomfortably, she hates the looks of pity, those are the worst. "It’s whatever Scorp," Catra says dismissively, passing her to reach the stairs. "I gotta get out of here." 

"You shouldn't be alone Wildcat." Scropia says softly and, shit, she really cares. 

Catra pauses at the top step. Sometimes it's easier to push people away, in fact, no, it's always easier to push people away, and Catra, she's a coward, she doesn't know how to let people in, not really, so she scoffs and looks at Scorpia with her best scowl. "Please," She says, rolling her eyes. "like I need you." 

Maybe it's a little harsh, and it does pull at her heart when she sees Scorpia's hurt look, but this is what she does best: screw up her relationships and has severe trust and abandonment issues. The hurt leaves quickly however and is replaced by a look of determination. "You know I'm always here for you Wildcat. no matter what, forever." Catra looks down at her own feet at hearing that. Forever. It was hard to believe but maybe…  _ no.  _ Catra had been down that road before and it had ended badly, she had been hurt beyond repair, had a festering wound which was never going to heal, she was a detriment to everyone around her, she… she couldn't, she  _ wouldn't _ , allow herself to rely on anyone other than herself. 

** _//_ **

Where Catra ended up was the skate park. She used to come here quite regularly with Adora, she’d even skated for a while until one day she’d fallen off and broken her wrist. she was ordered to stop skating while it healed and just never got back on the board, now she just came here to watch other people skate, or her favourite thing: do graffiti. This time it was the latter she was doing. Technically, it wasn’t illegal, the city had allowed for a section to be tagged and painted on, which Catra was using, she didn’t know how many layers of paint this thing had on it but it had to be in the hundreds, if not thousands, people would be respectful though, always giving new pieces a few weeks to shine before covering it up with new art plus there was plenty of room for people to spread it out. The only rule really was no profanity, like 'fuck you' or similar, unless in artist expression, which Catra could argue could mean anything and cover anything really, but she was happy they at least had a place to spray paint legally so she wasn’t about to complain about it. 

She’d been out here for hours, her hands were turning numb from the cold, but she enjoyed this time by herself, just space to clear her head away from everyone and doing something she loved, besides, it was September, the weather was cold but not too cold yet, she could get away with her oversized hoodie to keep her warm. The evening was just say bleeding into night, with the sky turning a darker more soft blue, the first sign of stars twinkling above her, she wasn’t going to make her curfew but so what? She’d just have to climb into her room by her window again, no biggie. 

She tosses her paint can into her bag again and sighs, burying her hands into the pockets of her hoodie. Paint stained it in odd places where Catra had either slipped or she’d been too close when spraying, not that she minded, this hoodie was more for her painting time anyway, her hands were also spotted with paint but it was satisfying to see evidence of a job well done. She examines her painting one last time before she looks off in the distance. 

The thing about the skate park is that it’s right next to a regular park that has fields for baseball and even some basketball courts, and other things. Although those are a little distance away, Catra sees her immediately. Seriously? Was Adora just everywhere now? Catra steps forward, she should run away, leave before Adora notices her, but, well, it's kind of comforting. Even after all this time, Adora is who she most wants to see when she’s having a bad day. 

Catra sees the exact moment Adora notices her because she had been playing baseball and playfully tossing a ball in the air when it came down and hit her on the head after she does a double take. Catra allows herself a snort at it. What a dork. 

Adora stares for a moment, and Catra stands still, she doesn’t want to invite Adora on up but she also finds she doesn’t want to leave either. Then she’s whispering something to one of her friends and jogging over to Catra. Catra sighs and leans against the wall, throwing one of her boots against it to support her weight, she feels a little like a deflated balloon, she always did after Weaver tore into her like that, she hated how down it made her feel. "Catra." Catra turns her head to see Adora had already reached her and she hadn’t even broken a sweat. 

"Oh, hey Adora." Catra says, like she hadn’t just been staring at her ex best friend a few minutes ago. Catra sees the exact moment Adora notices something is wrong because she gets this crinkle right between her eyebrows and she turns her head to the side slightly, kind of like a golden retriever puppy. It's so annoying and so annoyingly cute too. 

For a moment they stand in semi awkward silence, the only sound between them the rustling of nearby trees, and the scraping of wheels on pavement from the skate park, Catra signs at the cool breeze that manages to slip under her hood and into her hair. "Are you..." Adora trails off, probably thinking better of what she was about to ask. "What are you doing here?" She asks instead and Catra has to resist the urge to roll her eyes at the lame attempt to start a conversation. 

"Oh, you know, sightseeing," Catra replies coolly, earning her a scowl of annoyance from Adora. "what? Can’t a girl just come to the skate park?" 

"Something’s..." Adora trails off again but Catra hears the end of the sentence all the same:  _ wrong _ . Something is wrong. Adora can sense it. She’s annoyed that Adora is still so in tune with Catra that she can tell when something is up with her, even when she hides it under her usual snark. "How’s your," Adora raises her hand to her own face and gestures vaguely. "you know?" 

"Sore," Catra admits, though every day it got a little less stingy and a little more achy, she assumed that was a good thing. "shouldn't you be over there with your friends?" Catra asks flatly. She raises her eyebrows at Adora who seems slightly offended, or maybe defensive is a better word, at the question. 

"I just… you seemed like you wanted to talk is all." Adora says hesitantly and Catra looks down at her feet. She doesn’t want to talk. Not about what Adora wants to talk about but, like she said before, Adora brings her a comfort she can’t find anywhere else, just her being near is making Catra feel a little better about herself. 

"I don’t."  _ Liar _ . Catra looks up in time to see Adora deflate. She’s still trying. Why is she still trying? Catra feels that anger simmer again, just under her skin. Why should Catra tell Adora what's bothering her? She lost that right when she left her in the Group Home with… with…

Catra stands abruptly, no longer leaning against the wall, she has her hands clenched at her sides in pure anger but this anger, this hatred, it wasn’t just at Adora, it was largely at Weaver, but Adora is standing right there and Catra knows she has a tendency to lash out at people who don’t necessarily deserve her anger. She takes a deep breath and steadies her rapidly increasing anger. She examines Adora instead who, admittedly, looks amazing. She’s wearing only a t-shirt, which Catra doesn’t understand how she’s not cold, but she has the sleeves rolled up, clinging around her biceps which are incredibly toned ( _ had Adora always been so buff? _ ), she's also wearing shorts, god, she’s such a jock, it's amazing sometimes how Adora dresses herself, Catra’s half amazed she’s wearing trainers and not crocs. 

Adora clears her throat and Catra blushes realising that probably looked like she’d been checking Adora out for god knows how long. She scoffs and looks away from the blonde. "God, you're such a jock." Catra says and Adora seems to perk up, probably seeing this as an opportunity to tease Catra, to get some normalcy back between them, Catra wasn’t so sure. 

"You're such a tortured artist." Adora replies with a playful smirk and Catra frowns at her. She sees Adora's playfulness slip a little into apprehensiveness, she really is trying. 

"Shut up," Catra replies, but there’s no bite to her words and Adora knows it, she pushes herself off of the wall, she grabs her bag of paint and zips it shut. When she turned to Adora again the blonde's blue eyes were sparkling with fondness. "I have to... curfew." Catra says, knowing Adora would understand. 

"Oh," Adora says, uncertain, and then her eyes widen a little. "Oh, yeah, of course." Nevermind the fact curfew was gone and Catra never really obeyed that rule anyway, Adora seems to get the hint that she wasn’t in the mood to talk, and she really wasn’t, she just wanted to be around someone who didn’t think she was a waste of space, that was all, and, despite everything, Adora had always given her the benefit of the doubt, always been there, but now - Catra sighs - she had to find something else. 

She starts to make her way back home but only manages a few steps before she feels Adora grab her arm, it's exactly where Weaver grabbed her but it is nothing like her grip, this is soft, yet firm, a 'wait up' grab and not a 'stay right where you are' grab. Catra turns to look, first glancing at Adora's hand, which had her forearm wrapped tightly, and then at Adora who's blue eyes were sparkling in the dying evening light. 

"Catra, I-" Adora chokes, she doesn’t let go of Catra's arm but squeezes softly instead, like she was trying to communicate her feelings through that touch. "I'm sorry, when Angella offered me a home I couldn't... I couldn’t go back, I couldn’t pretend that she’d never asked, but I never wanted to leave  _ you _ ." Adora places her other hand above the one which was wrapped around Catra's forearm and Catra holds her gaze for a long moment. 

She wants to believe her so badly, but she’s just not ready. She wants nothing more than to say ‘fuck it’ and just drop this anger and instead pull Adora in and hug her,  _ hard _ , but she can’t, for all the reasons she should, she can’t. Adora is giving her an intense stare back and Catra doesn’t know what to say, she honestly doesn’t, she loves her, she hates her, she  _ needs  _ her but she can't have her. Best friends. But Catra couldn’t go further than that. 

In the end, the moment is broken by someone from across the field calling Adora's name. Catra takes a step back, letting Adora's hands fall away and she looks off in the distance. "You should go back to your friends," Catra says. "see you around Adora." She turns and this time Adora doesn’t stop her, she lets her go, and, honestly, Catra wishes she’d grabbed her one last time, maybe she’d cave, maybe she wouldn’t, but now they'd never know.

** _//_ **

Adora watches her leave though she wishes so badly that she would stay. That she could take Catra back to her new home and keep her there hidden in her room for the rest of their lives but she’s pretty sure that wouldn’t go unnoticed. Adora looks away only when Catra disappears over the ridge, she recognised what Catra had been doing, she’d seen her do it on several occasions, when Adora would skate Catra would paint, it was her best stress reliever as far as Adora knew. 

She walks around to the wall so she can examine the painting that Catra had done and as soon as her eyes land on the wall she takes a sharp breath in. To someone who didn’t know the artist they’d probably think it was just a political piece, maybe it was a little, but Adora could clearly see the true image behind the picture. The image was of a shadowy figure blocking out all light around a smaller figure which stood in front of the person, the shadowy figure had her hand on the smaller figure’s shoulder, which was more like talons, and stark streams of red ran down from the woman’s hand, and the smaller figure’s shoulder, because of the iron grip she had on her. It was clear to Adora that Weaver was the shadowy figure and Catra was the smaller one, trapped in her darkness with no escape, completely at her mercy, and Adora felt horrible because it had been bad when she had been there but now it definitely seemed worse. 

Adora had known something was off with Catra, she seemed less full of snark and smugness than normal, more mutable and quiet, softer, in a sad way, which was not like her nor was it a good thing. Shit. Adora tore her eyes away from the painting and debates running after Catra, afterall, she wouldn’t be that far away, and Adora knew the way to the house like the back of her hand, but something stopped her. Catra hadn’t pushed her away but she hadn’t exactly been receptive either, she probably wasn’t in the best of places to hear what Adora had to say and pushing Catra on things like this was never a good idea, that was a sure fire way to hurt them both. Instead, Adora snaps a quick picture of the painting and stuffs her phone back into her pocket before jogging back over to her friends. The lack of movement was allowing the chill of the evening to bite at her. 

“Adora, you’re batting.” Glimmer yells from the sidelines where she was sitting wrapped in Adora’s hoodie. She was their unoffical ref, since Glimmer had argued she didn’t want to ruin her shoes playing ‘stupid’ sports. Bow hands her the bat with a gentle smile. 

“All good?” He questions, probably sensing Adora’s weird mood. She smiles back at him softly and nods her head. 

“Uh huh, just old friend stuff.” Adora shrugs, gripping the bat tightly. He nods though he seems unsure but doesn’t question her further. Adora takes her place and sees it’s Mermista who’s pitching which is good because she can actually pitch - unlike Sea Hawk. She winds her arm back and throws, Adora’s eyes follow the ball, time seems to slow and in that time she feels anger roar inside of her, in her ears, she imagines the ball is Shadow Weaver’s head and swings. 

_ CLINK _ . 

The bat connects with the ball head on and Adora hits it so far she hears the fielders groan and just sit down. Bow hollars from his place behind Adora yelling ‘Home Run!’, Adora takes a moment, she’d never felt that kind of anger before, never knew she was capable of it, but she’d wanted that ball to be Weaver, she wanted to hurt her for hurting Catra, and for hurting her when she’d lived in that house, not to mention all the other kids still locked in there with her. Adora takes off running at a light jog, letting her anger fester in her, she wishes things could be different, part of her wishes Catra had been adopted instead, that she’d been taken by Angella and Adora had been the one left behind, if only to save Catra some of the pain she was going through. 

When Adora makes it back she calls it quits and tells Glimmer she’ll see her back at home. She can tell they’re worried about her but she feels a little numb with anger and just takes off back to her house. She debates with herself, at the intersection, going to the Group Home, climbing the big old oak tree that was just outside their window and tapping on it but there was no guarantee that Catra would let her inside so Adora heads back to her new home. 

She storms inside, ignoring the greeting of her foster parents and heads straight to her room, closing her door when she got there. She paces the floor a few times, clenching her fists, she had half the mind to be scared of this anger, of this  _ resentment _ , she had for Weaver, it was terrfying, but also she was just so fucking mad, she couldn’t think of anything else. She takes a deep steadying breath and drops onto her bed, pulling her phone from her pocket. She examines the painting again and then thinks what the hell. She pulls up Catra’s name and shoots the picture off, then texts underneath ‘you okay?’. 

She waits for a reply, even for the read receipts, anything really, with bated breath. When she sees Catra has read it she feels her anger slack a little, then she almost had a heart attack when she sees the bubble at the bottom pop up to signal she was replying. Minutes past that Adora gets nervous that Catra was taking so long but when the bubbles don’t reappear she realises that Catra had been about to reply but she’d clearly changed her mind. That shouldn’t make Adora giddy but the last few times she’d simply ignored her, left her on read, this was  _ progress  _ and Adora couldn’t help but feel a little excited. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Adora is a sad yearning lesbian in canon and in this fic confirmed, the Catradora fandom imploded on Twitter a few nights ago with Adora's love letter to Catra, god she's so whipped. Anyway, please consider leaving a comment, I need the validation, and thank you for the comments/kudos previous! See you next week with an update!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hey!” She says happily. “I wasn’t expecting you to come.” 
> 
> “I wouldn’t miss it for the world Princess.” Catra responds, inching closer, she’s aware that people are probably staring, on both sides, and the thought brings a small blush to her cheeks, Adora seems surprised by her response. “I couldn’t miss the Horde tearing you Princesses a new one.” Adora’s face falls a little, like she hadn’t said what Adora wanted her to say, but then she perks up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This update is a little late, I apologise, I got busy prepping for me starting uni and work had me feeling tired. But it's here! Please enjoy!

"How the fuck did that happen?" Catra blinks at Scorpia who was sitting on Adora's bed again. Catra wasn’t sure why she thought she suddenly had the right to come and go in her room without an invitation but she also didn’t have the energy to tell her to get out. 

"I have no idea." Scorpia responds, shrugging her broad shoulders. Catra sighs, massaging her temples with her hands. 

"Why would they even allow that? They do realise the history right?" Catra raises a brow and Scorpia simply shrugs again. Scorpia had just broke the news that the teams of Bright Moon and Horde High would be playing against each other in their Homecoming football game. Usually Catra wouldn't give a rats ass about football and jocks but this was…  _ interesting _ . 

Bright Moon and The Horde, as they were called, had a bitter rivalry. Catra was surprised they'd allow the game to go ahead considering fights and brawls were not off the table when it came to these two teams. The game was going to be held on Bright Moon's field, which wasn’t a surprise, the princesses at Bright Moon probably thought the Horde's field was a shoe box or something. "Oh we have  _ got  _ to win." Catra says seriously. Adora. Adora would be playing against The Horde this time, instead of for, and Catra wasn’t about to let her school lose to Adora, she wasn’t about to lose to  _ Adora _ . 

"For sure Wildcat." Scorpia nods seriously. Catra turns, examining the wall her bed was pressed against instead of looking at Scorpia, she could do it. She was going to fuck with Adora so much she’d be too distracted to play star quarterback, she’d make her look like a fool, plus Bright Moon losing to The Horde? Catra would pay good money to see the look on their rich kid faces at that. She had an idea, or, at least, the beginning of one brewing in her mind, she had a bunch of stuff this week to worry about other than some football game, but this was for sure one of her main priorities. She had to beat Adora for once, she had to get under her skin and win. 

Catra startles at the sudden sound of her door opening and whips around to see Entrapta barging in with one of her inventions, she ignores Catra's look of disbelief and starts rummaging through Catra's desk drawer. "Okay, when the hell did you two decide you could just barge in here?" Catra asks looking between Scorpia and Entrapta who wasn’t paying an ounce of attention to the artist. Catra clears her throat and Entrapta gives her a look before continuing to rummage through her drawer. 

"I'm looking for a six-sided hex driver." Entrapta says distracticly and Catra feels herself become exasperated as she so often did when it came to Entrapta. 

"Well I don’t have a… whatever it is you just said." 

"I think I left it in here the last time I was here." Entrapta replies dismissively. Catra stares at her in disbelief. 

"Wait, you... do you come in here when I'm not in?" Catra asks. When Entrapta doesn’t respond she feels her anger spike. "Entrapta! That's so  _ not  _ cool!” Entrapta stops her tinkering for a minute and turns to look at Catra who gives her her best scowl she has. Entrapta glances between Catra and her project before she produces a tape recorder from  _ somewhere  _ and presses the record button. 

“Subject C feels as though her privacy has been invaded, perhaps… perhaps entering someone’s room while they are absent is wrong? More data required.” She clicks the button again and carries on tinkering, ignoring Catra completely once again. Catra groans, she feels like tearing her hair out in frustration, she had the wierdest friends in the whole fucking world - Entrapta especially. 

“You two are the worst.” Catra grumbles, which she instantly regrets when Scorpia jumps to her feet and practically gets Catra into a headlock. 

“Come on Kitty,” She says happily. “you don’t mean that!” Catra resists the hug to the best of her ability but Scorpia is persistent, she’ll give her that, so in the end she just gives her a defeated sigh and lets herself be hugged by the woman. 

“Enough,” Catra swats Scorpia away, who finally releases her. “we have a Homecoming game to win, and also Lonnie is cooking tonight and I am  _ not  _ going to miss her burning the house down.” 

** _//_ **

Catra comes up with the perfect plan. Well, maybe perfect was a strong word, but she was somewhat confident it would work. Despite everything, Catra knew that Adora’s one weakness was still herself, you couldn’t just erase years of friendship, even if you do get adopted by some rich family, so Catra was going to play that angle to the best of her ability. She’d planned everything as well as she could, pulling Scorpia and Entrapta and, hell, even Lonnie (while she wafted smoke away from the smoke detector) in on her plan. They’d all shared a weird confusing glance when she’d said it but Catra had chosen, and was still choosing, to ignore it. 

Currently, she was putting her scheming aside in order to focus on her visitor from Grayskull College, she had the whole art room set up in a kind of private gallery or something and she was second guessing her outfit, remembering how Adora had called her such a tortured artist, maybe she should lose the leather jacket, or the flannel, maybe the ripped black skinny jeans were too much? Maybe she should have dressed smarter, but, then again, she was a high school, nearly college, student, not interviewing for a job, besides, her work could speak for her anyway, she just had to try and relax. 

Catra turns when she hears the door open to the room and in steps a young looking guy, probably not that much older than Catra herself, but he’s obviously the scout if his jacket with Grayskull’s huge and obnoxious logo is anything to go by. “Catra.” He says kindly, with a bright smile, if Catra is honest he kind of reminds her of Adora; with the blue eyes and blonde hair. 

“That’s me!” Catra’s voice comes out squeaky.  _ That’s me? _ She has to restrain herself from face palming. “Uh, I mean, yes sir?” 

“Please,” He says dismissively, with a gentle chuckle. “call me Adam.” This guy was giving off some serious Adora vibes but Catra feels herself relax a little at his gentle smile. She smiles at him nervously, and when he turns to begin examining her art she wipes her sweaty palms down her thighs. 

He looks at her art closely and slowly, occasionally making notes in the little notebook he had and asking Catra about different pieces. “You certainly have a theme.” He says after looking at one of Catra’s newest pieces. Catra knew what he meant, she definitely did have a theme. “You want to tell me the story behind them?” Catra looks at the ground, unable to meet his gentle gaze. “Ah,” He says. “I understand.” 

“Art is... “ Catra trails off, looking at her numerous paintings that littered the room. “It’s very important to me, it’s how I express myself, because I’m terrible at doing it any other way.” He laughs at that and Catra looks up at him, feeling her own lips tug upwards because he seemed like he really understood. 

“Well, you’re good,  _ really  _ good,” He assures. “look, art scholarships… they’re hard to come by, and I can’t make any promises, but your grades are… an issue.” He looks uncomfortable briefly. “C average is by far not bad but at Grayskull we usually push for higher.” He explains and Catra curses herself for self sabotaging herself into this position but, really, that was Shadow Weaver’s fault. 

“I can do better, I know I can.” Catra vows. He looks at her for a long moment, seemingly like he was deciding if he believed her or not. 

“Why didn’t you take your SATs junior year like your peers?” He questions gently. “If you don’t mind me asking, of course.” Catra feels small suddenly, and wraps her arms around herself in some lame attempt to keep herself together. 

“I was… in a bad place.” She wasn’t lying, Adora had told her about the adoption junior year, that she’d be leaving Catra, and Catra had completely spiraled. She hadn’t been able to do basic stuff, never mind study for some supid test that Weaver would hold over her for the rest of her life, so she deferred. “If my grades are the problem I know I can do better sir- Adam.” She says awkwardly. “I just need a chance, I can do it.” 

“I believe you.” He says with a little chuckle, making another note in his book. “If your grades improve I feel confident that you may be receiving an offer from us for a scholarship.” Catra almost blacks out right then and there. She was enough. She was good enough for this college that they were willing to give her a scholarship, which she desperately needed because without a scholarship Catra wouldn’t be going to college full stop. “Once we’ve seen the improvements to your grades we’ll probably request your portfolio and when you get your SATs we can make an official offer.” 

“I… thank you so much!” Catra almost feels like she might cry, but she won’t, she never cries in front of strangers. He smiles again, and then took one last look around the art room, examining her paintings. 

“You know, one day I hope you can do a painting that’s brighter.” Catra knows what he means and she nods her head and, yeah, she hopes she doesn’t always feel quite so hurt and lonely, and like a dark cloud is following her around, but living with Weaver, and Adora leaving, she knew it would be a while until she could go through with that painting. 

He takes his leave and Catra sits down on a nearby stool and sighs. She allows herself to feel a little proud, Grayskull, one of the top colleges in the country, wanted  _ her _ . All she had to do was improve her grades and, considering she did that on purpose, she could absolutely do that, which meant she might get a scholarship, and maybe Weaver was wrong, she was worth a damn, and she wasn’t a disappointment. She was just as good if not better than Weaver’s golden child, maybe that would be better revenge against Weaver, outshining Adora and showing Weaver just exactly what she was missing out on, showing her how good she really was, even without Adora. 

Fuck Shadow Weaver, she was about to get everything she ever wanted. Well, not everything… Speaking of, she had to finish planning how she was going to help their second rate football team beat those Bright Moon Rebels,  _ especially  _ their quarterback. 

** _//_ **

The week seems to fly, Homecoming was coming fast and all everyone could talk about was the football game between the Horde and the Rebels. Even Weaver had talked about it which Catra had only half listened to. Usually during this time of the year Catra would make fun of those losers but go to the game anyway because Adora was there, this time, she was still going because of Adora, in a way at least, but she had ulterior motives and she had been more involved than she cared to admit in the activities surrounding the game. She’d even had Scorpia explain the drills they’d been running and, with the help of Entrapta, she’d given Scorpia instructions of how to improve those skills and specifically target the Rebels plays, she’d been way too involved in football now that she felt a little weird about it, but they were finally here: Homecoming. Catra was even riding on the football team’s coach, sitting next to Scorpia who was rambling excitedly about god knows what. Catra was too busy staring out the window to hear. 

She had to hand it to this prissy school, it was kind of awesome looking. Horde High was grey concrete upon more grey concrete, the only colour was the flag that waved pathetically outside the front, the place was bleak looking yet, to Catra, kind of weirdly comforting, she was used to it she guessed, yet her artistic nature meant she couldn’t  _ not  _ admire the way Bright Moon’s elegant curving modern building of white and pink, and even some marble, gave the school a kind of palace looking image and, despite its colour scheme, it was also a little imposing, definitely impossible to miss. 

The football coach gives the football team some words and before Catra knows it they’re all exiting the bus, Catra feels tiny surrounded by all these buff jocks but she knows what she has to do tonight, she’s about to help these losers win the biggest game of their high school careers. “Hey Scrop,” Catra says. “I’m going to go grab a seat, I’ll see you out there.” 

“Of course you will!” Scorpia says with a hearty chuckle, pulling Catra into a bone crushing hug, which she protests to but really she’s grown used to it by now. Catra grumbles and straightens out her jacket, which was zipped up, before taking her leave. The footballers make their way to the locker room while Catra heads towards the bleachers. She had been here once before but this time, instead of trying to keep it a secret, she wanted Adora to notice her, in fact, she was kind of counting on it. 

The bleachers were already starting to fill up, they’d split the schools up, which was probably for the best considering. Catra makes herself at home right at the front of the Horde side of the bleachers, sitting down and huffing with slight annoyance. She still couldn’t believe she was about to sit through a football game for no reason other than revenge and winning against her ex-best friend, she really couldn’t believe it. 

Catra perks up a little when she notices a certain blonde out on the field running drills, warming up clearly, she wasn’t in her football gear yet, just a jersey and sweats, but she still looked amazing. Adora notices Catra about the exact same time Catra notices her, kind of like Adora had sensed Catra’s eyes, the blonde freezes, Catra smirks and gives her a wave, mouthing ‘Hey Adora’, even across the field Catra knows her eyes widen. She stumbles a little on thin air before she has this big goofy grin and waves back, Catra rolls her eyes. Adora is so easy to manipulate it’s almost laughable. She still cares for some reason. Even though she left? Catra doesn’t understand. 

Loud music starts booming and some obnoxious teenager’s voice comes over the intercom, the football players, who had been warming up, start leaving, Adora lingers for a moment, holding Catra’s gaze, before she leaves. Catra sighs, this was going to be quite a night. “Catra!” Catra jumps when she hears a squeaky voice next to her. “Can we sit here?” Catra raises a brow. 

“Do whatever you want Kyle.” Catra responds. 

“Right!” He says nervously, sitting down beside her, Rogelio was next to him, looking imposing as ever, Catra never understood why Rogelio didn’t join the football team but, for such a buff guy, he was a gentle giant. He couldn’t speak, but Catra and the others had learnt sign language in order to be able to communicate with him, even though Rogelio could read lips it was nice that they could understand what he had to say too. 

Catra reaches over and grabs a handful of the popcorn Kyle had in his lap. “Hey!” He protests. 

“What?” Catra asks, shoving the popcorn in her mouth. “Sharing is caring.” Kyle says nothing more and begrudgingly allows Catra to skimp off of his bucket of popcorn. Catra hates to admit it but she kind of wished Entrapta had come, if only to entertain Catra with her ‘examining’ social experiments, but Entrapta didn’t do well in crowds, she especially didn’t do well at big rowdy football games, she was happy to stay at home, honestly, Catra was slightly jealous, she’d much rather be at home than some stupid high school football game but whatever. 

The cheerleaders take the field to pump the crowd up before the football teams make their entrance, Catra can just imagine Adora giving her teammates some inspirational speech about kicking Horde butt.  _ Ha! Not tonight. _ Not on Catra’s watch. Catra watches the performance distractedly, she admits they’re kinda good, even the Horde’s cheer squad rivals Bright Moon, and Catra grins to herself, she loves the competitive atmosphere, it’s like electricity, their years of rivalry was going to make this a Homecoming game neither side would forget. 

When the football players finally jog out onto the field the whole crowd stands to their feet for whatever reason though Catra remains seated. Bright Moon comes out first, Adora leading the charge, she looks good, Catra isn’t above admitting that, it’s still strange to see her in the white and gold number jersey rather than the burgundy red and black of the Horde jersey, Catra never thought it would feel so weird, but, mostly, she looks the same. Catra knew behind that hemet her brain is going a mile a minute, her grey-blue eyes stormy with thoughts, Adora was an amazing strategist, it’s what made her such a good quarterback, she was a natural leader  _ and  _ athletically inclined, what could be more perfect? Catra rolls her eyes. 

Adora jogs the front of the bleachers, soaking in the cheers of her peers, she even shows off to the Horde who boo her. Catra smirks, despite everything, she did like to see Adora play. It was about the only time Adora was truly her cocky self and she genuinely enjoyed herself. Adora pauses in front of Catra, who raises a brow, before the football player does something she probably shouldn’t: she runs over to the bleachers and hops up on the fence, Catra instinctively sits forward so she can hear the blonde. “Hey!” She says happily. “I wasn’t expecting you to come.” 

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world Princess.” Catra responds, inching closer, she’s aware that people are probably staring, on both sides, and the thought brings a small blush to her cheeks, Adora seems surprised by her response. “I couldn’t miss the Horde tearing you Princesses a new one.” Adora’s face falls a little, like she hadn’t said what Adora wanted her to say, but then she perks up. 

“Please,” She says dismissively. “we’re going to destroy you.” 

“I wouldn’t be so sure.” Catra says with an edge to her voice. She trails her finger gently over Adora’s arm and Adora stares at it for a moment, visibly gulping. “Good luck Princess!” Catra says, sitting back in her seat, watching Adora stare at her dumbfounded. Her eyes narrow, like she’d just caught onto the fact what Catra had just been doing, and, shit, if distracting Adora had been this easy already, it was going to be a treat in a minute. Distract the quarterback and the game falls apart. 

“Hey Adora!” Kyle squeaks. Adora looks at them with surprise, like she’d just noticed they were there, Catra smirks at that. 

“Oh, hey guys.” She replies, signing a greeting to Rogelio who nods in acknowledgement. She holds Catra’s gaze for one more moment before she jogs back over to join her team who all seem to be glancing, not so subtly, at Catra. 

When The Horde makes their exit, Bright Moon begin booing and Catra actually pulls herself to her feet, out of spite, to cheer for her school’s team. She can recognise Scorpia pretty easily, if not for her structure, she had a scorpion sticker on her helmet that Catra had designed, she had no idea she’d stuck the thing on her helmet. The players begin their quick warm ups and huddles and before Catra knows it they’re starting the game.

** _//_ **

It’s close and it’s dirty. Catra is aware she’s doing a pretty damn good job at distacting Adora, she’d winked at her a couple of times, she’d caught Adora staring at her when she had been giving instructions in her huddle, her helmet removed for the moment, and Catra had blown her a kiss, she must have stumbled over her words because her teammates all glanced behind them in Catra’s direction, Adora had been playing a little distractedly after that. She was so easy to manipulate, Catra almost felt bad -  _ almost _ . Now they were in the last few minutes of game play, they were so close, The Hode was winning but only just barely, despite Adora’s distracted mood, she was still playing fiercely so Catra knew for this last play she had to play her biggest card she had. 

The players line up, Adora behind her center, Mermista, Catra thinks she’d seen that on the back of her jersey, and begins yelling. Catra unzips her leather jacket and removes it just as Adora calls the play, Catra yells over the sound of the crowd, “Go Scorpia!”, Adora only glances at her but she freezes as soon as she does. She does a double take and Catra gins to herself, her secret weapon was that she was wearing Scorpia’s jersey, she’d only ever worn Adora’s, she knew this was going to either really hurt Adora, or at least shock her enough to distract her, and it  _ works _ . 

Adora freezes, Scorpia, the middle linebacker, breaks through the Rebel’s blockers and runs right at Adora and sacks her  _ hard _ . Adora goes down and Catra winces a little at the impact, Scorpia is strong, Catra has been tackled by her hugs plenty of times before to know that’s true, and those had just been hugs. Adora drops the ball, someone, maybe Lonnie actually, from The Horde scoops it up but Catra is too focused on watching Adora sit up in a daze. She looks towards Catra and Catra waves innocently in response. Lonnie makes it, the buzzer goes off signalling the end of the game and The Horde side of the bleachers erupts into deafening screams. 

Catra plucks her leather jacket up and slips it on before she climbs over the fence landing on the track that circled the football field. Scorpia is running towards her, removing her helmet and dropping it in the grass, she has the biggest grin Catra has ever seen on her face before which, actually, is really saying something considering she always seems to be smiling. 

Catra doesn't even think about it when Scorpia picks her up like she weighs literally nothing and hoists her to her shoulders, running to the field with a screeching Catra. Catra grips Scorpia's shoulders, so she doesn’t get thrown, and begins laughing uncontrollably with genuine glee. She pumps her fist in the air and yells "Yeah!" over the roar of celebrating football players who are all pating Scorpia on the back. Scorpia is blushing furiously, Catra is sure, but then she sees one of the Rebels, with a very familiar structure and number, jogging towards them. 

Catra smirks, leaning her elbow on Scorpia's soft head she plants her chin in her hand and suddenly she understood why everyone went a little crazy about sports, it wasn't the sport itself, it was the  _ rivalry _ , especially when that now included Adora. Catra's breath hitches when Adora removes her helmet, revealing that her classic ponytail had come loose, some strands stuck to her neck slick with sweat while other strands curled giving her this kind of hot sweaty look. "Hey, Adora." Catra calls and Scorpia comes to a halt in front of the blonde too. 

"Oh, hi Adora!" She greets cheerily and Catra rolls her eyes, she has half the mind to tug on Scorpia's hair and tell her to be more mean but the thought ceases when she sees Adora's annoyed expression. It's absolutely delicious. 

"Seriously Catra?" Adora asks, ignoring Scorpia's greeting. "That was low, even for you." 

"Aw," Catra teases, making a gesture with her hand like she was booping Adora's nose, despite them being feet apart, Scorpia was so tall, Adora still flinched as though Catra had actually done it. "you know nothing’s too low for me." Adora puts her hands on her hips and huffs in annoyance. She looks adorable, Catra will give her that. 

Catra begins laughing at her, beyond the teasing and the games, Catra's kind of enjoying seeing Adora so flustered, and there’s something so familiar about it too. Even Adora seems to feel it as a small smile plays at the corner of her lips, though she tries to maintain her annoyed facade. "You high and mighty rebels were never going to win," Catra calls. "I mean, look at Scorpia here," Catra pats her shoulders for emphasis, hearing the hard plastic of shoulder guards crack at the action. "you never stood a chance." 

"Oh boy! Thanks kitty!" 

"Don’t ruin the moment." Catra warns. Already picturing Scorpia's sparkly eyed look. Adora observes them for a moment, one of her blonde brows raising, and Catra feels her own cheeks warming at the suspicion she could see reflected in those blue eyes. She knew what Adora was thinking, she was so far off base, but, if it threw her then, Catra got what she wanted didn’t she? So she doesn’t correct Adora's assumption, just sits on Scorpia's shoulders, she’s actually rather comfortable, who knew being carried around was so much fun. 

"Hey, you were really great out there." Scorpia compliments and Catra rolls her eyes. 

"Thanks." Adora answers stiffly and, wait, was she  _ jealous _ ? Adora had this whole clenching of her jaw thing going on, her eyes weren't blue anymore, they may as well have been green, usually she’s such a people person but now she’s all awkward and avoiding eye contact. 

"Adora!" Catra’s eyes snap up to see a young man running over with a girl, who had pastel pink hair, in tow. Now it was Catra’s turn to feel jealous, she knew they were Adora's new best friends, Adora smiles so brightly Catra wants to climb down Scorpia like a tree to wipe her smile off her face but she stays planted on the woman’s shoulders firmly. "Tough game!" Bow yells and Catra winces at his voice breaking. He seems to notice Catra and Scorpia suddenly and his eyes widen. 

"Bow, Glimmer, this is Scorpia, and... Catra." She laughs nervously, Catra knows that laugh, had she told Bow and Glimmer something about Catra that she didn’t want them to repeat? 

"Oh my god,  _ you're  _ Catra." Bow asks his eyes wide and Catra narrows her eyes. 

"Try not to shit the bed kid." Catra says and he actually genuinely laughs at her dry humour. Maybe Catra could get along with Bow, Glimmer, on the other hand, was staring at her like she’d just killed her mother or something. "What's wrong sparkles?" Catra asks, smirking when she sees Glimmer's eye twitch. "Cat got your tongue?" 

"It’s  _ Glimmer _ ," She stresses. 

"Right," Catra responds. "what did I say?" She can practically see the steam come out of the girl's ears. Adora places a hand on her shoulder and squeezes softly, which silenced whatever Glimmer was about to say, Catra examines them for a moment, though her eyes primarily stay on Adora, she’d never say this out loud but Adora had really become seriously beautiful. She’d always been beautiful, sure, but she had shredded those last remaining awkward teen years it seemed, she was filling out perfectly, if the way her football tights gripped her legs and her toned biceps were anything to go by, her jawline was sharper, like she’d lost that remaining baby fat in the months Catra had been apart from her, and her blue eyes seemed deeper, more rich with colour, it was annoying. How dare she look so good? 

Catra tunes out of the conversation and has a kind of mini silent one with Adora. She hunches over Scorpia, dropping her arms down the woman's front, resting her chin on her head, it was a little awkward but totally worth it when she notices Adora's eyes narrow and her lips press into a tight line. She’s pissing Adora off, and  _ maybe  _ making her jealous, that was awesome! 

" _ Bow _ !" Glimmer hissing at her friend, and elbowing him in the ribs, brings Catra back into the conversation - though she keeps her eyes focused on Adora who was now avoiding her gaze. 

"We'd love to come!" Scorpia says excitedly and Catra raises a brow because ‘we’ always meant her and Scorpia, and she didn’t know what Scorpia was dragging her into because she’d been too distracted and now she was going to pay. She curses herself for focusing on Adora so much. 

"Wait, what exactly are you talking about?" Catra asks and Bow looks at Glimmer with a guilty look before he answers the question. 

"I invited you guys to Mermista's, she’s throwing a homecoming party, her dad is out of town again so..." He shrugs. Catra almost falls off of Scorpia's shoulders. 

"I never agreed to that." Catra protests, she almost whines, she likes parties, sure, but not stupid teenager parties, they're far too crowded. 

" _ Oh _ ," Scorpia sounds disappointed and Catra frowns. "sorry wildcat." Catra groans dramatically at her friends dejected tone. How could she say no to that? She may be cold but she isn't heartless plus Scorpia is her  _ only  _ friend. 

"Well, we’ll be there," Bow says enthusiastically. "Adora too." 

"Adora?" Catra turns to look down at the blonde who had been fiddling with her helmet. "Adora is a drag." 

"I am not!" Adora protests. 

"Really Adora?" Catra asks, unconvinced. "You can’t have fun to save your life." 

"I'm fun!" Adora protests and Catra smirks, feeling some kind of challenge sparking between them. "I'm twice as fun as you." 

"Prove it." Catra responds, twirling a finger around one of her loose curls. Adora scoffs and crosses her arms across her chest, it reminds Catra of when they were younger and Adora had challenged Catra to a race, she’d beaten Adora, of course, sure, she wasn’t a jock but she’d always been fast, definitely more agile than quarterback Adora. 

"You're not even going." Adora says and Catra considers that. She puts her hands on Scorpia's head who, all this while, just stands there with Catra on her shoulders, apparently Catra's weight was nothing to the white haired football player. 

"Maybe we will." Catra says and she feels Scorpia move excitedly. 

"We should go," Bow says, cutting off whatever Adora was about to say. "we'll see you guys later?" He asks, grabbing both Glimmer and Adora's wrists, he looked anxious and Catra could guess why. 

"Oh absolutely," Catra drawls. "I can’t miss Princess Adora let her hair down for once." 

"Catra-" Adora huffs before she shakes her head. Bow drags them off and Catra watches them disappear into the locker room, though she did notice Glimmer shooting her daggers all the way there, yeah, Glimmer was not a fan clearly. 

"Shit," Catra says. "guess we’re going to a party." She lets Scorpia parade her around a little more, and enjoys feeling the praise of her schoolmates, but all she can think about is out-doing Adora at some stupid party, things were about to get wild.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Catra's a tease and Adora is a big dumb jock lesbian who falls for it. Hoping I'll be able to update on time next week but don't take my word for it, I've got some stuff coming up that might prevent me from doing so, though I really hope it doesn't. Please consider leaving a comment/kudos, I'll try to reply to comments when I can! Thanks for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What?” Catra asks, crossing her arms across her chest. Adora just keeps grinning. “I didn’t do that because I like you.” Catra narrows her eyes and Adora gets this smug smile that irritates the life out of Catra. 
> 
> “I mean, I didn’t say anything.” Adora says, looking around casually. She leans forward and Catra freezes at the sudden close proximity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a little late again but I was busy last weekend, sorry! I start uni next week so I'm freaking out a little about that. Anyway, hopefully you enjoy!

"Scorpia, come on." Catra raps her first against the door in annoyance. Scorpia had been in there for half an hour, if she didn’t hurry up they'd never make it out of the house before curfew and, while Catra could easily scale the house out of her room window, Scorpia wasn’t known for her grace, climbing out of the window would  _ not  _ be a good idea. 

"I don’t know kitty," Scorpia says and Catra can hear the apprehension dripping from her voice. "maybe we shouldn't go." 

"Are you kidding me?" Catra asks, she feels her annoyed mood spike but manages to reign it in, so as to not upset Scorpia further, that wouldn't help the situation. "Come on Scorp, you told Arrow boy we'd be happy to go, and I said we'd be there, we can’t not go." They’d look like cowards, and Catra was  _ not  _ into looking like a coward,  _ especially  _ to Adora. 

"I feel dumb." Scorpia replies and Catra resists the urge to groan at her. 

"Open the door," Catra says, instead of the scathing rant she wants to give the other woman. "please." She tacks on the end when Scorpia makes no move. She hears movement on the other side of the door and Catra sighs. Really, Scorpia could be so dramatic sometimes, and that's saying something coming from Catra. The woman opens the door, only slightly, and sticks her head out. 

"Maybe you should just go by yourself." Scorpia says and Catra's eyes are immediately drawn to the large hoop earrings in the woman's ears, not to mention she had some amazing makeup going on. 

"You can’t leave me," Catra says, shaking her head at seeing Scorpia wearing makeup. "you're my backup." Which is true, Catra wouldn't be going to this party if Scorpia wasn’t, she couldn't stand that shit, the fact that Scorpia would make it bearable made Catra feel slightly uncomfortable, she didn’t like replying on others for such things, she had with Adora, Adora had made everything more bearable and look where that had gotten her, but Scorpia is about the only friend she has, excluding Entrapta, and going to that party alone is not an option. 

Those words seem to win Scorpia over as she pulls the door and steps out onto the landing with Catra, who's eyes widen when she sees her full outfit: she was wearing a denim jacket, which had the sleeves ripped off so her big buff arms were on display, she had a shirt, which she’d tied off at the bottom so a section of her smooth abdomen was on show and she had denim jeans sitting on her hips and black boots to really tie the whole thing together. Usually Scorpia just liked to wear her Letterman jacket, plain clothes, pretty similar to Adora if Catra was honest, though Scorpia always had some sort of makeup situation going, Adora not so much, and she looked good, Catra wasn’t blind, she was, however, emotionally unavailable, and probably would be for the rest of her life, so she’d never go there but, well,  _ wow _ . 

"Holy shit." Catra breathes. Scorpia instantly blushes, she scratches the back of her head nervously and waves her other hand dismissively. 

"You're right, I should change." Scorpia says but Catra catches her arm before she can leave. 

"No, I mean, you look good." Catra admits. "I just... you've been holding out on me." Catra says, smirking, this seems to make Scorpia blush harder. Catra ignores the excessive blushing and instead begins to drag her towards the stairs. Maybe she did have a type? Were jocks hot? God Catra hates that shit. Why should football players have the monopoly on looking good? That seems slightly unfair. 

On their way out, they're halted by a voice which sends a sliver of ice down Catra's spine. Shadow Weaver floats into the living room ominously, like she just caught Catra doing something wrong, but, then again, she’s always done  _ something  _ wrong to Weaver. "Where do you think you are going at this hour?" She asks. Catra can feel Scorpia's shaking frame behind her, Weaver, though she targets Catra specifically, is still terrifying to everyone who lives under this roof, Catra's put up with her shit for too long that she’s slightly immune to her terrifying presence, though only just, sometimes she’s just a really good actor, or liar, she hates letting Weaver know how much she unnerves her, and it would be worse for her to realise how much Catra actually fears her. 

"It’s not curfew." Catra says dismissively, which was apparently the wrong thing to say because Weaver's eyes narrow and the room gets slightly darker - tainted with her rotten mood probably. 

"I never said it was," She days, drifting closer, Catra is barely aware of Scorpia's bulky frame behind her as Weaver stands in front of her, everything seems to fade to the background, she always has to be on alert whenever Weaver is like this, she never knows exactly what she’s going to do, and Catra knows from experience to stay on guard when it comes to the likes of her. "it will be soon though, do you plan on coming home later than usual?" Weaver asks it innocently but there is no innocent questions with her. 

Catra narrows her eyes, especially when Weaver extends her hand and gently touches Catra's jaw, kind of like she was caressing her cheek, which was weird, it gives Catra the creeps, Weaver is never gentle, especially not to her. Catra fumbles over her words, the lie she had planned getting stuck in her throat, the unexpected affection catching her completely off guard. "We're... going to a party." Catra answers, straightening up when Weaver withdraws her hand. 

"Where is this party?" She asks. 

"Uh," Catra glances behind her at Scorpia who simply shrugs. "it's at this girl's house, Mermista." 

"Mermista." Weaver says, almost in a growl, she links her hands behind her back, she towers over Catra, she always seemed abnormally tall, Catra wonders if she wears super high heels so she can look imposing constantly. "Will Adora be there?" Catra frowns. Of course, she should have known. Weaver's obsession with Adora never disappeared, she would always be obsessed with her goddamn golden child. 

"I don’t know and I don’t care." Catra says bitterly, though she knows that she will be. That, decidedly, was the wrong thing to say as Weaver glares at her. 

"Do not take that tone with me child." She grits out. Catra clenches her jaw, it's so demeaning to be called a child by Weaver, she’s almost an adult, that was total bullshit and she knew it. "I only asked you a question." 

"Probably." Scorpia answers this time and chuckles nervously when Catra fires her daggers with her eyes. Weaver hums in thought, stepping away from the pair and gliding towards the kitchen again. 

"You may break curfew if you wish, I don’t even expect you home, if you wish to stay out, you may tonight." Weaver says and Catra can’t believe what she’s hearing. She has a bad feeling. Part of her feels like she shouldn't question this, Weaver is just being generous, but Weaver is never generous, she must have something planned, surely, maybe she wants Catra to get close to Adora again, only for Adora to rip her heart out again, or maybe Weaver just wants Adora back in some form and she’s using Catra to do it, it wouldn't surprise her, but, whatever the reason, Catra remains quiet, if she had to live her life trying to not do what Weaver wanted her to do, she’d never live life. Still, spiting Weaver is one of her favourite pastimes. "Dismissed." She throws towards them and Catra practically pushes Scropia out of the door. 

"Huh," Scorpia says once the door is closed. "that was weird." 

"That? Weaver’s mind games are like any other regular Friday." Catra scoffs and Scorpia chuckles a little. "Let's get out of here." Catra says, pulling Scorpia towards the address that Adora had texted her, though Catra still hadn’t replied. 

** _//_ **

Mermista's house was just about what Catra expected from one of those trust fund Bright Moon babies. It was huge, and outside had numerous boats, Catra couldn’t comprehend why someone would need one boat never mind several, but, then again, she lived in a house with 5 other teens, who were all either abandoned or orphaned, and who were lucky to have a roof over their heads - even if that unfortunately included having Shadow Weaver under the same roof. Adora had certainly upgraded who she hung around with at least. 

The door to the front of the house was open and the sound of loud music was blaring through, the positive about the house was that it was practically in the middle of nowhere, which meant no neighbours. Catra barges through the front door, shoulder checking some obnoxious guy who was giving what sounded like a sea shanty, of all things, to a small crowd. Catra makes her way directly to the alcohol and scoops up a beer and hands Scorpia one too. 

That's when she hears shouting from the other room and she turns towards the living room to see what the commotion was about. " _ Adora! Adora! Adora! Adora! _ " Catra leans against the door frame between the kitchen and living room to see a certain blonde jock arm wrestling the guy who had been singing at the door only a few minutes ago. Adora had her tongue sticking out of her mouth in concentration, and her face was scrunched up in effort, but if Catra knew Adora, and she does, the blonde was faking it, she could beat that guy in her sleep. 

She slams his hand down on the table and lets out a hollar at her victory, high fiving Bow who was behind her, she offers the guy a cocky grin and folds her arms over her chest. “Best two out of three,” He demands, putting his arm back down in a challenge. Adora looked like she was going to take it until her pink haired friend interrupts. 

“No Sea Hawk, Adora needs some water I think.” Glimmer says. Adora snorts and gets to her feet, she almost falls over but Glimmer catches her arm which Catra narrows her eyes at. 

“I’m  _ fineeeeee _ .” Adora says with a big smile on her face and, well, shit, Adora was wasted already. She turns and catches Catra’s eyes, she seems to brighten suddenly, and Catra knows she’s about to come over. She turns and heads back into the kitchen, pushing past bodies so she could hide, but she only succeeds in finding Scorpia again before Adora finds her. 

“Catra!” She calls and Catra freezes. It’s like an outer body experience, she can’t help but react to Adora’s voice, even if she doesn’t want to. “Catra, hey!” Adora says with a giggle and Catra spins to be greeted by a very close Adora, she hadn’t realised she was so close. Catra’s hand lands on her chest, which she quickly shoves to create a little distance between them, Adora doesn’t even seem to notice, she just continues to grin at Catra in her drunken state. 

“You’re already drunk?” Catra asks, raising an eyebrow. 

“Sea Hawk challenged me to a shot drinking contest, I wasn’t about to say no, or lose, I beat him, just like I just beat him in the arm wrestle. Hey, you look good.” Adora was rambling and, honestly, Catra hadn’t caught the majority of that sentence, but she  _ absolutely  _ heard the end of it and she feels her cheeks heating up at the confession. “You always look good in that jacket-” Catra clamps her hand over Adora’s mouth in a quick panic and Adora’s eyes widen - even if they are hazy slightly from her drunken state. 

“Shut up.” Catra grumbles, removing her hand. Adora just carries on smiling and swaying but  _ silently  _ which Catra can handle. 

“I’m glad you came,” Adora says and Catra groans. Why couldn’t Adora do a single thing she was asked to do? “I miss you.” Adora starts pouting, and even worse, she looks like she might cry, and, despite everything, Catra can’t handle a crying Adora right now. 

“Sure you do, I’d miss me too.” Catra pats Adora’s bicep awkwardly but it seems to work as she smiles happily at Catra after that. 

“Can I…” Adora trails off, looking away, she seems to forget her trail of thought when she looks back at Catra. “Hey, how about we play a game of beer pong?” She asks excitedly pulling Catra towards the table. 

“Beer pong?” Catra asks, her brows rising in surprise. 

“Unless your afraid.” Adora challenges and Catra squirms out of the blonde’s tight grip. 

"Adora," Catra says in disbelief. "you can’t be serious." Adora says nothing, just plants her hands on her hips and grins widely, her blue eyes sparkling with the challenge. "You're already wasted, it wouldn’t be fair." Catra points out, but this point seems lost on Adora who simply scoffs and brushes past Catra towards the table that had been commandeered to be a beer pong arena. 

"Since when have you cared about playing fair?" Adora questions, wiggling her eyebrows as she leans against one end of the table. Catra's never been one to back down from a challenge, and she isn’t about to now, even if beating a drunk Adora will do little for her ego, especially when the likelihood of Adora remembering were slim, still, a challenge was a challenge and Catra could not refuse. 

"Well, when you put it like that," Catra grins smugly, standing across from Adora at the table. She grabs hold of Scorpia and pulls her beside her. "Scorpia is my partner." Catra claims. Maybe Adora hadn’t intended it to be a double match but Catra didn’t feel like getting too drunk, if she had a hangover tomorrow Shadow Weaver would have her head. 

"Fine," Adora says, though she does seem slightly irked. "Glimmer is mine." Adora declares grabbing hold of Glimmer's hand and pulling the tiny woman beside her. Glimmer yelps at that and Catra bites back a chuckle, Adora is seriously strong, sometimes she forgets this fact and can drag you around like a rag doll if you're not careful. Glimmer looks across and her eyes widen. 

"Adora," Glimmer hisses. "maybe you shouldn't, I mean, you're already... and both of us shouldn't... you know?" Drunk Adora definitely did not know because she just stared at Glimmer completely blankly, it would have been cute if Catra did feel a certain sinister feeling stir in her gut. 

"You're sparkly." Adora says with a giggle and Catra rolls her eyes - she’s really going to play beer pong against this Adora? She’s going to wipe the floor with her. 

Glimmer, too, rolls her eyes and stares Catra down. "If anything happens to her I'm holding  _ you  _ personally responsible." Glimmer says almost darkly, Catra almost has half the mind to gulp. Glimmer may seem like your average princess, like all the other Bright Moon princesses, but she has this tone that tells Catra she’s serious - she’s almost impressed that a 4 foot something teenager could intimidate anyone never mind herself. 

"I'm not her keeper." Cata says dismissively, though she is slightly worried if she’s honest. She doesn’t want to hurt Adora. So, despite what she says, she will look out for Adora. Glimmer seems to know this as she huffs and crosses her arms across her chest in defiance, catching Catra's eyes which had softened slightly when looking at Adora. 

"Let's play!" Adora says excitedly, producing a ping pong ball from God knows where. Catra sighs and shrugs, gesturing for Adora to begin. Adora grins, and begins lining up her shot, she does the thing she was doing with her tobgue while arm wrestling, it’s a habit of concentration, Catra knows, and it’s really fucking endearing. 

To Catra’s utter disbelief, Adora throws perfectly, and the ball lands right in the first cup of beer, Catra curses herself, she should have known even drunk Adora’s natural athleticism would be a problem. Catra downs the drink and gets her revenge, landing her own shot in the cup making Adora take a drink. They play like that for a while, occasionally swapping between pairs, Catra had a buzz going but she was nowhere near as drunk as Adora who could barely stand up straight, and Glimmer was terrible at holding her liquor, probably because she was so tiny, which meant it was two giggling idiots against Catra and Scorpia - they really didn’t stand a chance. 

In the end, Catra scores the final toss and Adora downs the beer. Catra highfives Scorpia, who was grinning ear to ear, before turning back to see Adora frowning at them. "No fair." Adora says pouting. "rematch." She says, planting her hands on the table and leaning forward. Catra's kind of surprised she doesn’t faceplant. 

"Absolutely not." Catra was certainly not about to play Adora again, the fact that she was still standing was a miracle in of itself, but the pouting did sway her a little. 

"Adora, Glimmer, I found you!" Bow appears in the room and gives his friends looks of concern before he looks at Catra with a small smile. "Hey, I'm glad you could come." 

"Isn’t Catra so cool?" Adora slurs, grabbing onto Bow who rolls his eyes. 

"I'm going to get these two some water, I'll talk to you later." Catra nods but she’d be perfectly fine if Bow didn’t make good on that promise. He disappears with the pair, dragging them by their wrists into the crowded kitchen. 

Catra sighs and leans against the table to face Scorpia, that's when she notices a familiar face heading towards them. "Lonnie? Did you follow us?" Catra asks, raising her eyebrows. 

"Weaver gave you two a free pass, you think I'd miss out on that?" She asks and Catra rolls her eyes. She should've known. Any kind of freedom Shadow Weaver offered was too tempting for anyone living in that house - because they never got any freedom. “Now where’s the alcohol?” Lonnie asks with a grin. Catra rolls her eyes again while Scorpia excuses herself to go show Lonnie where the alcohol was. Most of the time Catra and Lonnie were at each other's throats, but it was always in a playful way, kind of how siblings will bicker constantly but they’d both still die and kill for one another. 

Catra sighs, she doesn’t know why she came and something about what Shadow Weaver said sits uncomfortably with her. That woman always had an ulterior motive, one that Catra couldn’t always see, but she hated the idea she was playing right into her hand, she had half the mind to go back, but she couldn’t pass up this opportunity to see Adora actually let her hair down for a while. So she puts Shadow Weaver to one side and decides to focus on herself for once. 

** _//_ **

Catra manages to moderately entertain herself without Adora for a good couple of hours, she mostly just broods in dark corners but it works for her. She was just about to skulk into the kitchen again when she hears a familiar giggle. Catra whirls to see a familiar blonde in her red varsity jacket talking to some guy who was clearly being more than just friendly. He leans in and places a hand on Adora’s hip and Catra sees her go rigid immediately. Without even thinking, Catra is over there and between them in seconds. 

Catra pushes the guy’s chest and he stumbles back. "Back off asshole." Catra almost growls, stepping between the guy and Adora who was swaying happily behind her. 

"Hey!" He protests. "I was just talking." Catra rolls her eyes and scoffs. 

"You were getting touchy," Not to mention he was barking up the wrong tree, Adora was not into guys, the only reason she’d been talking was because she was flat on her ass drunk. "if you come anywhere near her again I'll break your kneecaps, understood?" The guy visibly gulps, and seems unnerved, which Catra takes great satisfaction in seeing, before he scoffs dismissively. 

"Whatever." He mutters before scurrying off. Catra watches him leave for a few moments before turning to Adora who was grinning so wide Catra was afraid she might permanently get her mouth stuck that way. 

“What?” Catra asks, crossing her arms across her chest. Adora just keeps grinning. “I didn’t do that because I like you.” Catra narrows her eyes and Adora gets this smug smile that irritates the life out of Catra. 

“I mean, I didn’t say anything.” Adora says, looking around casually. She leans forward and Catra freezes at the sudden close proximity. “Mermista said I should stay here, apparently I’m drunk.” Adora whispers this like it’s some secret and she’s not swaying side to side. Catra really wants to roll her eyes but she’s been told she does that a lot, instead, she looks around. The party was beginning to thin out, people were going home, all partied out, and, now that Catra thought about it, when she’d been brooding she hadn’t seen Adora’s new friends anywhere, so she couldn’t leave Adora alone, especially with creepy predatory guys hanging around, she’d never forgive herself if something like that happened to Adora. 

“Come on,” Catra says, offering an arm to Adora who eagerly takes it. “let's get you to bed.” Catra follows Adora’s lead, mostly, though she’s aware she’s mostly the one steering them despite not having the slightest clue where the hell they were going. 

Adora manages to navigate them to a bedroom, Catra’s not sure that’s much of an achievement though, a house like this probably has more bedrooms then Catra has fingers on her hands. The room is pretty standard, though Adora somehow led them to probably the only room in the entire house which only has one bed, and it’s a single, not that that mattered considering Catra was going to put Adora in bed and then leave, but still. 

She locks the door before turning to see Adora had plopped herself down onto the bed. Was she really about to do this? Was she about to take care of Adora of all people? Scorpia and Lonnie were probably still here, Catra could do a runner, leave Adora to pass out on the bed, but then her blue eyes were soft and inviting and she looked peaceful and almost vulnerable. Catra never did have the strength to resist those damn eyes. 

So she approaches Adora and Catra begins untying her laces in silence and pulling the blonde's trainers from her feet, Adora sits patiently, it feels weirdly intimate, being alone with Adora in a room, no one else around to buffer between, no pretenses between them, even if Adora is drunk, tipsy, whatever, Catra feels restless, maybe nervous is a better word, around her ex-best friend but she's here because she doesn't want anything bad to happen to her and no one else had been around to help Adora. 

Catra sighs, setting her shoes to one side, she pushes Adora's jacket from her shoulders and the blonde shrugs it the rest of the way off. She looks at Catra with such an intense gaze Catra can't even bring herself to look at her, not really, which is weird, considering this is Adora, but there's something in her eyes that Catra doesn't want to see. In the end, it doesn't matter, because, without prompting, Adora reaches her arms out and wraps them around Catra's waist, pulling her into an embrace. Catra's eyes widen in surprise but she doesn't have the heart to fight it off, plus she's tired, and what was the likelihood that Adora would remember this anyway? So Catra simply threads her fingers through Adora's hair, gently rubbing her fingers in a soothing pattern that brings a content sigh from Adora's lips. The whole thing is painfully familiar. And painfully intimate. 

"Adora-" Catra's words are cut off when Adora's arms tighten around her even more. 

"Please don’t leave." She begs and Catra feels her heart tighten in her chest, part of her wants to push Adora away, tell her that's what she got for leaving her in that God forsaken house, but she didn’t have the courage, or, more likely, she just didn’t want to. 

She won't admit it but she misses Adora like crazy, she'd wanted Adora beside her every night since she left, having that dangled in front of her? Catra can't say no. She's weak, she hates that Adora is still her weak spot, hates that she feels this longing to be with her, wherever she may be, but the fact of the matter is, she is and she does. She loves Adora, she may act like she hates her but she could never, she's loved Adora since they were five years old and Adora split her candy with her, she's loved Adora since they both clumsily kissed one another when they were ten for the silly notion of practicing, she's loved Adora ever since she met her and she can't stop loving her, not now, not ever. 

So Catra gives in, she let's Adora pull her onto the bed beside her, allows Adora to curl up to her chest, she places her hand on her back and rubs comforting circles there and she relishes in the sigh of contentment that comes with being next to Adora again. "I missed this," Adora admits, though she sounds sleepy, probably the alcohol wearing off. "sleeping with you, cuddling." To make her point Adora shuffles even closer, wrapping her arms around Catra securely. Catra chuckles, moving her hand from Adora's back, she cups her jaw and traces the blonde's sharp jawline, Adora's eyes are closed and Catra knows it's only a matter of time before she drifts off to sleep. "Will things ever get better between us?" Adora asks and Catra pauses. She thinks about that, about if things really will get better or not. 

"I don't know." Catra decides to answer truthfully, because she honestly doesn't know, she loves Adora, as more than a friend, but she can never tell her that, not to mention she still felt incredibly hurt by her absence. Catra would like nothing more than to say everything will be okay, that it gets better, but, in her experience, things only get worse. Adora doesn’t say anything but her grip tightens, if that was even possible. 

They’re quiet for some time, the only sound the sound of soft thumping from the music that was blasting outside the door, but it’s nice, Catra just enjoys having Adora close, not that she’ll say that out loud. “Catra?” Adora asks, breaking the silence, it startles Catra slightly because she had thought Adora had fallen asleep. Catra hums in response to let Adora know that she was listening to whatever it was she had to say. “Are you and Scorpia, like, together?” Catra frowns then she begins laughing her back off. She can’t breathe from laughing, which prompts Adora to break their cuddling to sit up and give her a look of offence and seriousness, which only makes Catra laugh harder. 

“What?” Catra asks, wiping a tear from her eye. “Are you jealous or something?” She asks and Adora bites her lip. 

“Maybe.” She admits. Catra stops laughing when the air gets clogged in her throat, she almost chokes actually. She hadn’t expected Adora to actually admit it. 

“No Adora,” Catra says, rolling her eyes at the blonde. “She’s… my only friend, the only person I’m sure won’t leave me.” Maybe that was a little harsh on her part but Adora doesn’t seem offended by the statement, in fact, she looks like she half expected it, and maybe she’s relieved that Catra told her there was nothing going on between herself and Scropia. Whatever the case, Adora settles back down on the bed, pulling Catra with her so they’re face to face, side by side, Adora smiles wistfully. 

This brings a strong memory to the forefront of Catra’s memory, they had been fifteen and talking in bed, face to face just like this, and Catra had just admitted she liked girls, and Adora had made a similar confession, and then they’d shared a kiss, a kiss they never brought up ever again because it had been just for practice, nothing more, nothing less, now Catra felt the urge to do it again, but that would get her nowhere, and cause more harm to herself than Adora, so she just holds Adora’s intense gaze as best she can. Adora frowns, bringing a crease in her brow to which Catra smoothes her thumb over affectionately, it’s easy in this calm bubble to be softer with Adora, to show her some compassion, rather than feeling what she’s been feeling since she left, rather than manipulating her in some way. 

“I love you Catra.” Adora whispers and Catra takes a sharp breath in. She knows in her heart of hearts that Adora means it platonically, they’re best friends, or, at least, they  _ were _ , that kind of love doesn’t just disappear, but she feels bitter with that knowledge beause Catra loves Adora, so much, and sometimes none at all, she gave Adora the power to hurt her more than any other person  _ because  _ she loves her so much, and Adora is hurting her even by loving her because it’s not how she wants her to love her, she wants more, and she also doesn’t, it’s all very confusing. 

“You’re drunk,” Catra decides to deflect, as she so often did when it came to confronting her Adora feelings, but Adora doesn’t seem impressed by this fact. 

“Maybe,” She concedes. “but I know how I feel.”

“What do you want from me Adora?” Catra asks angrily. She can’t ask for more, she doesn’t have the right. 

“I want my best friend back.” Adora says, almost desperately, she grips Catra’s tank, pulling her closer, and Catra’s eyes widen at the sudden closeness, not that they hadn’t been close before but now Catra could see every detail of Adora’s face from the flecks of grey woven into her baby blues to her wheat coloured hair. Catra doesn’t know what to say if she’d honest so she decides to placate Adora. 

“I’ll stay.” Catra promises, though she adds in her head that she’ll stay only till Adora at least falls asleep. This seems to calm the blonde, she stops gripping Catra’s tank and collapses in on her, snuggling up to her chest, and Catra lets a shaky breath out, burying her nose into Adora’s neck and holding her like she’s never held Adora before. When Adora’s breathing evens out, Catra decides to risk it. She cups Adora’s cheek with her hand and says, lowly, a secret confession made in the early hours of the morning where no one would hear her. “I love you Adora.” She stays longer than she should, abandoning Adora only when the music fades outside and the dark blue of the sky turns to a light gray. She looks back only once before closing the door. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Chants* Drunk Adora, drunk Adora, drunk Adroa, drunk- 
> 
> The gay yearning these two have. My favourite line this chapter was "Catra loves Adora, so much, and sometimes none at all" because I feel that pretty much describes Catra's feelings to a T: she loves her, but feels betrayed by her, and her feelings are too big and she doesn't want to feel them :( Anyway, I'll see y'all next week, feel free to follow me on Twitter @ catrasadoras as well as leaving kudos/comments below, I love and appreciate all feedback :)!

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for any spelling and/or grammar mistakes!


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